DATING STOP

5 Quick Ways to Find Your Next Date

2008-08-03T02:03:00.000-07:00

Overwhelmed with family, school, work and volunteer obligations, woman are turning to online dating or speed-dating services to do a little of their homework for them. However, you do not have to anymore.

Here are five easy things to look for whether at work, the grocery store, the local coffee shop or bookstore to locate you next date during your spare seconds--minus the fees.

1. Allows women to enter/exit the elevator first.
It may not seem like a big deal to most, but if a man is running late for a meeting yet still takes the time to let a lady on or off the elevator first, he is showing respect and appreciation.

2. Treats the janitor, waiter and cashier with respect.
How a person treats those who may not directly affect their livelihood, can tell you how he will treat you when a possible argument occurs in the future.

3. Offers you the last piece of pie or final copy of a best-selling book.
He is considerate and thoughtful. If you both reach for the item at the same time and he takes the last dessert or book without so much as a pause, he may be selfish.

4. Gives up his seat on the crowded commuter train to an elderly person.
Besides good manners, this man is considerate, protective, attentive and concerned for the well-being of others.

5. Greets/acknowledges those around him (when appropriate).
By acknowledging that others exist, he is respectful of others and not completely self-centered.
Determining if a guy is worth your time is all about his actions – what he DOES versus what he SAYS.

Time is a precious commodity many don't have the luxury of wasting. Why spend the next month dating someone who turns out to be egotistical, selfish and rude? Why pass on a potential date that fails to use the "right words" during your two-minutes at a speed-dating event. If you take the time to look for just five actions, you can "gift" your time to a better man.

FIND YOUR GIRLS AND GET AFFILIATE LINK : www.findmatenow.com

Hilary Duff Dating Hockey Star Mike Comrie

2007-08-03T03:44:00.000-07:00

Singer/actress Hilary Duff is reportedly dating U.S. hockey star Mike Comrie.

The 19-year-old star and New York Islanders ace Comrie, 26, enjoyed a night out at Los Angeles restaurant Katsuya on Friday (27Jul07).

The sportsman then accompanied Duff to Winnipeg, Canada on Saturday (28Jul07) for the opening date of her new tour.

An insider tells American magazine Us Weekly, "They're always together and can't keep their hands off each other."

Duff has a a couple of high profile relationship including Aaron Carter, younger brother of Backstreet Boy Nick Carter, after they met on the set of Lizzie McGuire.

The relationship latsed eighteen months until it was reported that Carter left Duff for actress Lindsay Lohan. He left Lohan and resumed datinf Duff before he cheated on the singer/actress with her then best friend.

Duff went on to to date Good Charlotte singer Joel Madden, who is now dating Nicole Richie, in 2004. The couple broke up in November 2006.

Jessica Simpson Using a Dating Service?

2007-08-03T03:41:00.001-07:00

Shouldn't Jessica Simpson be able to find a date? The buxom blonde has no kids, loads of cash and is still very young. Still she made the cover of Us Weekly recently as unlucky in love and now a report from Life & Style Weekly claims that she is using a dating service. I know what you are thinking - it's papa Joe's fault she can't find love.

The magazine has an item in this week's issue that reports that since splitting from Nick Lachey, Jessica Simpson has dated a string of musicians and actors - John Mayer, Adam Levine, Dane Cook - but hasn't had luck finding true romance.

***

Cue the rep™: Though Jess' rep denies it, a friend says the star is turning to a professional matchmaker to get the job done right! That has to be some job. Seriously, how hard can it be?

Jess, 27, "is done being set up by family and friends, and she's through with LA's club scene," the friend says. "She wants to meet a confident entrepreneur who won't use their relationship to fuel his ego."

The Many Faces of Online Dating

2007-08-03T03:37:00.000-07:00

Shoshanna Berman, an intern in New York City, is happily dating her ideal future husband: a nice, young -- and tall -- Orthodox Jewish man who is also outgoing and easygoing.

On date two, they bonded while scalping tickets at a Knicks game. Date ten, she remembers, was an all-night drive to Philadelphia.

"I would have married him if he asked me after the first date," Berman tells TechNewsWorld, "but it took him a few months to realize the truth." Now they are unofficially engaged.

Take away a few details here and there, and this could be anyone's "how we met" story -- including the fact that Berman met her beau at SawYouAtSinai.com, a dating Web site.

"My friend met her husband there, so I thought I would give it a try," Berman says.

These days, anyone who scoffs at online dating is either married or in the priesthood. The U.S. online dating market -- typified by such Web sites as Match.com and Yahoo Personals -- will reach US$932 million in 2011, according to figures from JupiterResearch.

Soul Mate Search
More than 20 million Internet users visited such a site last December, reported comScore. The top destinations were Yahoo Personals, Match.com, True.com, Spark Networks and Singlesnet.com. In short, from 18-year-olds in college (where there should be no dearth of potential suitors) to senior citizens, multitudes are logging on in search of love or companionship.

To be sure, not everyone who goes online finds a happy ending. Horror stories abound from the horrifying -- stalking incidents and worse have befallen many online daters -- to the annoying. (Hint: Using photos more than a year or so old always backfires.)

Sometimes it just takes a little patience to find your soul mate, says Robert Schwartz, author of Courageous Souls: Do We Plan Our Life Challenges Before Birth? Schwartz met his partner at JDate, another popular Jewish dating site. Several years ago, he posted a profile there but nothing came of it. Recently, though, in the most serendipitous manner possible, he connected with a woman, and they're about to move in together.

"I had been living in Oregon but thinking about moving home to Cleveland to look after my father, who was needing assistance," he tells TechNewsWorld. Idly, he perused the profiles in Cleveland and immediately gravitated toward the woman who would become his partner. "What I loved about her profile is that I could tell immediately she is spiritually aware. That is very important to me."

Fast-forward over several months of phone calls and visits. Schwartz is now moving to Cleveland.

Specialized Sites
It may be no accident that both Schwartz and Berman met partners on specialized dating sites. Mainstream dating site memberships are stagnating -- or, in some cases, shrinking. The proportion of paying customers has stayed the same -- 5 percent -- over the last five years, according to Jupiter.

Another Jupiter metric that suggests interest is beginning to decline: Only 10 percent of Internet users visited an online dating site in 2006 -- a decrease from 16 percent in 2005 and 21 percent in 2002.

One way the online dating industry is counteracting these trends is by introducing specialized Web sites that focus on commonalities that would-be daters hope to find. Many focus on religion; some focus on hobbies or professions.

Sparks Network, currently one of the top online destinations, operates over 30 online personals -- all but one of which is targeted toward a specific religious, ethnic or special interest group. JDate, launched in 1997, was its first site.

It makes sense, some say.

"Match.com is not for everybody," Todd Creager, a licensed clinical social worker and coauthor of Finding Life's Passions, tells TechNewsWorld. "There are those that thrive on generalized dating sites, but typically those are people who 'show well' -- whether it is due to looks, an extroverted style of writing, a natural sense of humor, social confidence, or some combination of these qualities."

Singles who do not make great first impressions end up feeling frustrated, he continues. "On a specialized dating site, one attraction may be the similarity of interests, vocation, religion, life challenges and so on."

Next Evolutionary Step
Specialized sites are the way to go for today's daters, says Steve Monas, author of several books about online dating and social networking, including Chemistry and Numbers: The Online Dating Guide.

"When I used JDate, there was already a feeling of comfortability, knowing that there will be some commonality moving forward," he tells TechNewsWorld.

However, the specialized sites may follow the path of the generic dating Web sites, he cautioned -- unless they evolve once again.

"Dating Web sites are now trying to get appealing features that will compete with free social networking sites such as MySpace.com and Plentyoffish.com," Monas notes. These sites, after all, are de facto meeting places and have come to compete with some of the larger, specialized dating sites.

Revenue from major sites will have to come from more personalized services -- such as selecting and contacting potential matches on behalf of members, he suggests.

Indeed, some of the newer specialized sites are focusing on what happens once you get past the third or so date and become a couple. eHarmony, a dating Web site known for its hour-long application -- and, more controversially, for not matching gay people -- has launched a Web site aimed at married couples who want to strengthen their relationship.

On the other end of the spectrum -- the far end -- is HoochyMail, a service that "brings couples closer together by safely and securely allowing them to create and share their mutual fantasies," according to site spokesperson Rob Frankle.

Basically, HoochyMail allows each couple to compose and e-mail fantasies customized with their own details. There are about 35 different occasions -- from Christmas to Thanksgiving to basketball playoffs -- in the system.

Thus far, the site has been very successful, judging by almost every metric, Frankle says, including opt-in numbers and click-through advertising rates. "Plus, we have never received even one hate mail."

In the online dating world, that's as good as it gets

Irresistable Dating Profiles and Personal Ads

2007-08-03T03:33:00.000-07:00

Think back to the ads and dating profiles you?ve read on dating sites. What is the one thread in all of them that makes them memorable? I believe it?s the subconscious message they send to the reader. I?m not talking about the come fuck me one liners by men who think it?s cool to publish the word fuck next to their photo. I?m talking about ads that speak to a person in ways that cause you to click ?reply?.
For instance, if you read an ad from a woman that says she?s 37, a single mother of 3 and works a full time job and has little time to spare but is lonely and looking for someone to spend time with, does that cause you to click that reply button?

How about if she wrote something along these lines?

When you contact me, you?ll meet a 37 year old woman who?s looking for someone to get excited about life with. Never mind that I?ve got 3 kids and work a full time job, I look forward to the time we?ll find to spend together.

Notice the difference? In ad number 2 there are hidden commands that she has sneaked in there to tell you what to do. ?contact me?, ?you?ll meet?, ?look forward? and finally ?spend together.? You read that and subconsciously you think, ?She?s waiting for me!? ?and that?s exactly what she IS doing.

When you write your next ad or update your profile, keep these words in mind. Use the tricks of the masters and embed the commands you want someone to perform and sit back and wait for the results.

Maureen is the author of the book how to win the dating game, ?Do you know how to get lucky online?? She does. She didn't always know. It took her several years of watching how other people got lucky and now you can learn it for yourself. You can also vist also her blog Feeling Flirty?Get a Date!, autumal confessions and Sexy Advice by Maureen. You can also visit the site
http://datingalerts.blogspot.com/

The world's biggest little black book

2007-08-03T03:32:00.000-07:00

have superhero powers. You may have them, too.

My powers make it possible for me to be virtually invisible while I watch millions of attractive single men wink at me from 240 countries around the world.

My powers are not in my computer.

If my superhero powers were to fall into the hands of all the single people in the country, the new U.S. Census figures show there would be more than 100 million single people to wink with.

In fact, other superheroes - matador20, likes2kuddle, ablasttobearound and timetoforget - just winked at me in the last 15 minutes, even though there's no one around me.

They could be winking at you, too. How?

If I tell ya, I'd have to call ya

Yes! That's right. Your cell phone has made the ultimate singles-superhero connection. It has joined forces with one of the world's largest online dating sites, Match.com, to form what the company calls MatchMobile. Now that little device has the potential to be the biggest little black book for half of the country's adult population - the single half.

Currently, the Web site's original PC desktop version boasts more than 15 million members. According to its figures, that number is virtually metastasizing, registering 60,000 new people daily. Extending the network to mobile devices will put an end to the much-maligned mating experience known as the waiting game, says Match.com CEO Thomas Enraght-Moony.

"When you send an e-mail out to someone you like via Match.com, you no longer have to wait for their response,'' he says. "MatchMobile will send a text message alert to your mobile device when the e-mail you are awaiting is received. Then, on the spot, from your phone you can respond to that e-mail.''

Shazam! That's immediate intimacy.

Finally, singles are not alone in their singleness

Jack Hibbard, Chad Lesnick, Elizabeth Hardy and Jenifer Beckman all live in Houston and range in age from 34 to 43. They are but a mere four singles in the vast virtual pool of the country's 60 million online singles. Although none has tried this new mobile dating, all have used or are currently accessing online dating sites from their PCs.

Their stories are e-tertaining.

Jack jumped online after his divorce; saturating the marketplace by using nearly every virtual vehicle - Match.com, eHarmony.com, MySpace.com and True.com. But it was not until he tried Yahoo.com that he finally linked to love.

Chad clicked with a woman he met on Match.com, and the couple dated for three years.

Elizabeth says she found something online she didn't realize she was missing: "My confidence. I had just gotten a divorce and wasn't ready to totally put myself out there,'' she says. "I posted my picture with only a few details on my profile page. When I saw how many men were interested in me, it made me think maybe my husband was wrong. Maybe I really am the attractive, smart and funny woman these men think I am.'' A year later, Elizabeth's self-image has soared after racking up more than 15,000 winks from single men on Match.com.

"Imagine if she had been able to see all those men wink at her on her cell phone,'' says Jenifer. "She'd be so busy working it she'd have to quit working her real job.''

Interestingly, Jenifer's real job is in marriage counseling. When she joined the online dating pool, she made a cannonball-like splash; dating 14 men in 14 days. "Sometimes I had to double book,'' she jokes. "All the winks and e-mails from interested men helped me have the confidence to date like a rock star.''

So what's with all this winking?

The winking game vs. the waiting game

The Match.coms winking system allows its users to let other users know they are interested in pursuing something further than just a look-see. When one user looks at another user's online profile and likes it, he/she can then click on the icon next to the profile picture to send a wink to the other user's computer.

The mobile application will then forward that wink to the user's cell phone via a text message alert. For example, if the winker's screen name is matador20, the text would say: Matador20 winked at you. If the winked-at wants to see what the winker looks like, he/she can click the link provided in the text message alert.

All cell numbers are kept anonymous. And the winks are free.

However, if winkers want to talk via e-mail, that will cost them $34.99 per month. Maybe matador20 should consider changing his handle to Rockafellah20.

The company's mobile affirmation service launched this week. What's next for the megamatchers? The site already employs Dr. Phil's advice for premium members. Will the future foster Dr. Phil on the fly? Or maybe Oprah's Bachelor Book Club?

Is technology microwaving romance?

We will have to wait to see, says Deborah Bridges, an Interpersonal Communications professor at the University of Houston. "This mobile trend could speed up the courtship phase, skipping key steps,'' she says. "Not only steps to protect your heart but steps to protect your well-being and safety.''

But this communication immediacy can also ferret out the fakes fast, Bridges says. "When you write an e-mail in a controlled environment (from your PC), you have more time to incorporate well-thought-out communication strategies designed to purposely mislead or misrepresent who you really are in hopes of impressing.''

Thirtysomething and single, Erin Dudka from Houston cites another possible drawback to having dial-a-date mobile capabilities. "Being too available turns guys off,'' she says. "If you text/e-mail right back, he may think you are just sitting around waiting for him.''

Superhero powers prevail

If you are single and reticent to mixing technology with your mate-matching, there is a chance you may get lost in space by skipping cyberspace. One of every eight couples married in the U.S. last year met online, according to a stat-packed Web video produced by the University of Minnesota. In fact, Match.com touts 400 marriages or engagements reported on average from members every month.

Plus, a recent Pew Internet study found 15 percent of American adults say they know someone who has been married or is in a long-term relationship with someone he or she met online.

Maybe that spate of stats will turn on your tech side, or maybe you will just remain in silent mode for now. But whatever you decide, just promise to use your superhero powers for good, not evil.

Well, maybe not entirely for good, but certainly for good dating.

Dating While Seeking GOD- A Road Less Traveled

2007-08-03T03:30:00.001-07:00

Why is it when it comes to dating that we go from one relationship right into another, searching for something from someone that only God is capable of giving us? Why do we think that leaping into another courtship will change our thinking and current situation in our lives?

We seem to have this delusion that we will live a happily ever after if we just find someone that will tell us what we want to hear and treat us the way we want to be treated. Then when God does bring us someone that tells the truth we find ourselves uncomfortable and go to someone who makes us feel better even though their not being honest with us.

While we should be with someone that treats us nice and with respect, we should not compromise our spiritual values with them. If we do, we will continue to go down a very lonely road filled with disappointments and frustrations, time and time again only to point our finger at others, ourselves and God.

The truth of the matter is until we acknowledge that it's our own relationship with Christ or lack of and not others that is contributing to these dead end relationships we will never experience the true love that only Jesus Christ wants us to have and can provide for us. However, this is the road most choose not to travel. Why? Because it's got to many hills in it. We hit big pot holes and it may take a few unexpected curves along the way.

It's easier to blame others and to have the attitude that the world owes us someone. But in the long run if we take God's road it will get us where we need to go, in much faster time and a more forfilling journey. First, Gods road leads us to having a loving relationship with Jesus Christ, and second we experience a cup filled relationship with the love of our life. The bible says, "Seek ye first the kingdom and all other things will be added unto you" When Jesus says that, he means all things. We just may have to travel down a road less traveled in order to get them.

It sounds simple enough, doesn't it? Though this road is challenging to say the least. Why? because we struggle with our fleshly desires to fill our internal needs instead of our spiritual needs filled by God. And our flesh will always be a thorne to us. So going from one relationship right into another won't solve the difficulties we seem to have in every relationship we experience. If we really want a true test about our lives look at the majority of our friends we hang with. How are their relationships with others? If they are having the same difficulties we are experiencing, maybe that should tell you something about your own life and where you are getting your validations from. If we want to make a true change in ourselves the majority of our friends and resources must be those that are living Godly lives, having relationships with others like we desire to have, and telling us the truth in love, when maybe we don't want to hear it. Looking in the mirror at ourselves is not easy, but it's necessary.

It really boils down to our mindset toward life and having a lot of faith in Jesus Christ. Yes, we may temporarily feel better about ourselves when someone new in our life satisfies our egos, and pride, but the emptiness will still be there. God and life has a funny, yet sometimes painful way of making us look in a mirror at our patterns of relationships. If your tired, frustrated and even lonely about going from one dead end relationship to look at our own relationship with Jesus Christ. Because, if you really think about, he's our best bet anyway. And he'll be the one at the end of the road less traveled filling our cups, not another person.

Dating in Tucson

2007-08-03T03:29:00.001-07:00

Especially in a college town like Tucson. Sure, there are plenty of bars, clubs and unattached folks around the University of Arizona area, but what happens when you mature past that demographic? Hang around there too long and you'll risk being slapped with the "creepy" label. It's a spread-out city, so there's not just one spot where people can get together to mix and mingle.
"I think it's a really hard town to meet other people in," said Katrina Setzer, owner and co-founder of singles group Tucson Fun & Adventures Inc. "I think part of it is because we're so spread out. There's not any downtown area where we can all go — there's Fourth Avenue, but that's all college kids."
"For people in my age range or older, it's difficult," added the 39-year-old Setzer.
So what's a single Southern Arizonan to do, besides perhaps cry into his microwaved soup for one? Luckily, several organizations in town are watching out for the uncoupled among us.
Speed dating
Speed dating started in the late 1990s, and has blossomed into a full-fledged cultural phenomenon. And it's going on right here in Tucson — although there's no guarantee you'll meet as many colorful characters as Steve Carell's character did in that scene in "The 40-Year-Old Virgin."
The dominant name in the Tucson speed-dating scene is Cupid.com/ PreDating. Sort of a hybrid of online dating and speed dating, all participants fill out online profiles on Cupid.com before going to one of the speed-dating "PreDating" events held by the national company. Then a group of evenly numbered male and female singles meet at a restaurant or bar and pair up for six minutes of small talk — the idea being that six minutes of conversation is enough time to decide whether or not you're interested in talking to someone again. After that, you're on to the next person. Every guy gets a chance to talk to every girl and vice versa (at this point, it's aimed solely at heterosexual singles).
For those who like speed dating, it removes a lot of the guesswork — all of the participants are (presumably) single and looking. Meeting 12 people in one night can obviously be very efficient, and the environment is fairly relaxed.
Maureen Benigno, local event coordinator for Cupid.com and PreDating, said it's a lot safer than dating online. "If you want to talk to someone again, or don't want to, you can."
After the event, the speed daters log on to their Cupid.com profiles and give the yea or nay whether they want to meet anyone from the event again. If there's a match (two yeses), they can contact each other and the rest is essentially up to them. Organizers try hard to ensure that people who have met at a previous event don't cross paths again if they sign up for a future one — imagine how awkward it would be having to spend six minutes with someone you've already given a "no" to.
Benigno, a retiree from New York, has been coordinator for about five years, with her husband, Anthony, helping at events. Her daughter, a PreDating event coordinator in Charlotte, N.C., had suggested she try and get it started here.
"It really took off in Tucson," said Benigno of PreDating and speed dating in general. "I think it was the first one here," she said of her organization.
The Benignos say their clientele consists of a lot of professionals, including engineers, lawyers, doctors, nurses and teachers. "A lot of people think you have to be desperate, and that's not the case," Benigno said.
Ben Myerson, a 26-year-old computer programmer, was a first-time speed dater at the recent Melting Pot event and skeptical going into the process.
"It's not nearly as terrible as I thought it would be," Myerson said.
Others also appreciated the low-stress, no-nonsense approach.
"I think it's hard to meet people in Tucson," said Jamie Wagoner, a 30-year-old physical therapist. "We did this once before and it was a total disaster, but this was much better. I think the age range was better."
Different speed-dating events target different demographics. The event Wagoner attended at the Melting Pot was for women ages 23 to 33 and men 25 to 35, but an Aug. 14 event at Benihana is for women ages 29 to 39 and men 31 to 41.
The event Aug. 20 at Fleming's Steakhouse & Wine Bar is for an older crowd — women ages 49 to 59, and men 51 to 62.
The age discrepancy between genders is by design.
"I think a guy is just more comfortable meeting younger women," Benigno said, "and a girl is usually looking for older men."
The Benignos say they can count some committed love connections that happened as a result of speed dating. "It's great when you hear back that they're getting married," she said. "It's like you're making a difference in people's lives."
Cost: $35 if you register up to a couple of days in advance, $40 after that.
Info: Pre-dating.com/speeddating/TUC.php or 235-3068.
Tucson Fun & Adventures
Tucson Fun & Adventures — referred to as TFA by its approximately 350 active members — celebrates its 10-year anniversary this month.
Started in 1997, the group gathers single people from all over town with the goal of simply having fun doing a variety of activities. Relationships and marriages have arisen as a result of the club, but that's usually not the first thing on the minds of the members.
Setzer and a business partner founded the group after a similar organization in town (that she worked for as an event coordinator) folded.
"It was their concept," she said. "They were only in business for about a year. We tweaked it, made it a lot less expensive."
Setzer came from the travel industry, and had almost no experience running a business when she and her partner started Tucson Fun & Adventures.
"Seven years into it, she met a member, fell in love and had a baby," said Setzer, who bought out her partner's share two and a half years ago. Up until then, they worked out of their home offices, but Setzer now has an office space for the organization.
She's clear about what TFA is not.
"We're not a dating service. The way we kind of tout ourselves is an activities club."
Setzer is aware, however, that many members are frequently also looking for something more.
"I think that everybody would love to meet their soulmate. This is just kind of a comfortable way to get themselves out there," she said. "Most people say that they join to meet people, but I think deep down everybody would like to meet that special someone." Setzer estimates there have been 130 marriages of people who have met through the group (and that she knows of only one divorce).
Every month, members gather at a local restaurant or bar— this past month at Pinnacle Peak — to go over the slate of programming scheduled for the month, which varies from dancing and happy hours to hiking, whitewater rafting and scuba diving.
The group also plans trips — as close as Mexico, which members hit often, and as far as New Zealand and Fiji, where they are going soon. Members can go on as few or as many events as they want. Setzer said there's between eight and 130 people at a given event.
The group attracts a fairly diverse crowd, though Setzer admits that almost all of its members are straight.
Recently, a few dozen people ranging in age from their 20s to their 50s gathered for a pool party, held at a North Side home of one of the members.
"We do these two times a month in the summer," said Tucson Fun & Adventures Club event coordinator Amy Swanson. "There's a lot of food and a lot of social interaction."
True to her word, the pool party (which cost members $15) indeed offered both — chicken cooking on a grill and a variety of side dishes, while the guests chatted and hung out at the pool as loud '90s pop hits blared. Many had known each other for a while, but at least one was totally new to the organization.
"I graduated school in Wisconsin and was offered a job in Tucson," said Mike Erickson, an aircraft mechanic who, at 24, seemed to be the youngest person at the party.
He said the only people he knew in Tucson when he moved here recently were his grandparents, which is why he searched online for a group like TFA. He said that the only other real socializing he'd attempted was heading to Maloney's on a Sunday night. "There were like five people there," he explained with a laugh.
So far, he likes what he's seen with TFA. "It's a really great club for people new to the area."
Of course, there was the issue of being the youngest guy at the pool party.
"It does seem like I'm a bit younger," Erickson said. "Hopefully I can meet someone my age."
At 46, video editor Bryan Pierson seemed closer to the median age at the pool party. He's been involved with the group for six years and said he likes it because even if you don't make a romantic connection, you make friends and always have something interesting to do.
"You join the club because you want to meet people," Pierson said. "It gives you a club where you can come in and have 100 friends, and there's a lot of different things for different age groups."
Unlike Erickson, Pierson isn't new in town — he's lived in Tucson all his life. But he still makes an effort to hit five to six events a month.
Some members, like 40-year-old counselor Sherry Rigby, join just wanting to make friends.
"That's not what I'm here for," said Rigby, of looking for romantic relationships. She joined more than a year ago. "I have made a lot of good friends in this club.
"What I liked about it is there are a lot of events that are pre-planned; you can pick and choose."
Former member Monica Avery agrees. She joined the group while single to meet other women to go out with, and has since married someone outside TFA. Although you have to be single to remain in the group (Setzer said that married people who met through TFA can retain their membership, but they usually don't choose to), Avery keeps up with the friendships she's made with TFA.
"It's a social club," said Avery, who credits the group with helping her find more confidence to get out and meet people. "If you're out and having a good time and enjoying your life, people are going to notice that and ask you out."
Swanson met her boyfriend through the group. "If you're wanting to look for someone, it works for that. But if you're just looking for some friends, it works for that, too."
Roy Albright, a 47-year-old commercial photographer, also met his significant other through the club. Despite having a girlfriend, he still attends group events, and even hangs out with fellow TFA members outside "officially sanctioned" get-togethers.
"If you come with the attitude of just looking for that quick hit," he said, "that doesn't work. I think the guys that have the most fun are the ones that are just here to have fun."
Cost: New members pay a one-time "initiation fee" of $249, or $199 if they join at a meeting. From there, they pick how long they want to be an "active" member — it's $174 for six months, $288 for 12 months and $499 for 24 months. If someone leaves the group, he can come back at any time.
Many events are free, some are $5-$15, and some, like the Fiji/New Zealand trip, cost up to $2,500.

Pediatrix audit raises eyebrows

2007-08-03T03:28:00.000-07:00

When Pediatrix Medical Group recently announced the results of a nearly year-long investigation of stock-option grants, Chief Executive Roger J. Medel came out fine.

The audit committee of the Sunrise company's board placed most of the blame for back-dating -- changing the option's issue date to financially benefit the recipient -- on its former chief financial officer, Lawrence M. Mullen.

But an attorney for Mullen, Morris ''Sandy'' Weinberg, said that the report was unfair and incomplete. ''The CEO was fully apprised as to the entire program,'' Weinberg said.

Three corporate-governance experts and a shareholders' attorney who read the company's statement on the investigation concluded that the company's board had gone easy on Medel, a cofounder of the physician-services firm.

Stock options allow holders to buy shares at a later date, typically at the price on the day they were granted. In instances of back-dating, companies manipulate the grant date to a day when the stock price traded lower -- thereby ensuring immediate profits for holders.

Companies back-dating options are obligated to report the holders' built-in gains as compensation expense in their financial results. Otherwise, companies give an inaccurate picture of their performance.

Pediatrix will have to record a $33 million noncash, pre-tax compensation expense from Jan. 1, 1995 to March 31, 2006, though no back-dating was found after August 2000.

ACADEMIC POSITION

Boston University Professor James E. Post, who teaches corporate governance and ethics, said the failure of Pediatrix's management to prevent back-dating warrants Medel's ouster by the board.

As pressure mounts nationwide on firms with back-dating problems, the Pediatrix case is far from over. The Securities and Exchange Commission and the U.S. Attorney's Office are continuing investigations.

On Wednesday the first CEO convicted of back-dating activities -- Ryan Brant, formerly of video-game maker Take-Two Interactive -- was sentenced to five years' probation by a New York judge after pleading guilty to falsifying business records.

Meanwhile, a California jury is deliberating in the first back-dating case to reach trial. Ex-Brocade Communications CEO Gregory Reyes, like Medel, didn't personally benefit from back-dating options, but he's charged with misleading investors by back-dating hundreds of grants and not properly disclosing the effect on Brocade's financial statements from 2000 to 2004. The outcome could determine whether other executives implicated in back-dating investigations are criminally prosecuted.

Nationwide, at least 200 firms have announced internal or federal investigations and more than 100 have had to restate previously reported financial results because of back-dating, according to Bloomberg News. More than 90 executives and directors have left their jobs.

In the Pediatrix probe, the board's audit committee engaged independent counsel and forensic accountants to review all stock-option grants from its initial public offering in September 1995 to June 2006. The investigation found 56 stock-option grants made on seven dates from 1997 to 2000 that appear to have been back-dated.

AUDIT'S FINDINGS

Bob Kneeley, Pediatrix's investor-relations director, emphasized that the audit committee found no ''intentional misconduct'' by current executives.

The committee found that Medel, Pediatrix's CEO, was actively involved in determining who received grants and the amounts during the time back-dating occurred. He also was party to e-mails that addressed ''the selection of favorable dates for option grants,'' according to a press release issued by the company on July 26.

In fact, the committee found Medel directed the selection of a ''favorable grant date for a group of regional medical officers, one of whom was his his spouse, a founding physician of the company.'' Virginia Turnier, Medel's wife and a neonatologist, wasn't identified by name in the release.

Yet, the release added, ''the audit committee believes that Dr. Medel was not aware of the accounting implications of such grants'' and that he ''reasonably relied'' on other executives to administer the grants.

That surprised some observers.

''Letting him off the hook because he wasn't aware of the accounting implications is pretty hard to believe,'' said Kenneth Vianale, a Boca Raton lawyer who represents shareholders in back-dating lawsuits (though none against Pediatrix). ``It's a business expense. If he doesn't know that much, he shouldn't be the CEO of a public company.''

James Owers, a Georgia State finance professor, agreed: ``A CEO that doesn't know that, you could question whether they have sufficient knowledge for that position.''

The audit committee concluded Medel ``bore overall responsibility for assuring that management's implementation of its compensation programs was appropriate.''

Still, some corporate-governance experts said the audit committee soft-pedaled its findings on Medel.

''The facts would support a sharper rebuke of his leadership in this area,'' said James Post, the Boston University professor.

''This is the kind of control-systems failure that senior management had to be aware of. If they were aware of it and let it go on, then they are clearly culpable. If they were not aware of it, then they weren't doing the job of oversight and it's negligent,'' he said.

THE ACCUSED

The executive Pediatrix accuses of directing the back-dating is Mullen, the former CFO and chief operating officer. The report found he selected ''favorable dates for option grants in all but one instance.'' It says he personally gained $12,000 by back-dating options.

Sandy Weinberg, Mullen's lawyer, denied his client benefited from the back-dating.

''There's absolutely no evidence of that,'' Weinberg said.

Some corporate-governance experts were skeptical only one officer directed the back-dating.

''Just looking at the press release, to implicate a single individual is a little scapegoatish,'' said Paul Hodgson of The Corporate Library, a governance-advocacy group.

Hodgson added that any nonofficer employee who benefited from back-dating should pay back their gains.

Pediatrix announced three beneficiaries of the back-dating have agreed to repay their gains from back-dated options. The names and amounts: Turnier, Medel's wife, $519,000; President Joseph M. Calabro, $144,950; and Karl B. Wagner, the current chief financial officer, $154,975.

The back-dating probe hasn't hurt Pediatrix's shares, which are up more than 25 percent since the investigation launched last summer.

Institutional Shareholder Services, which provides corporate governance advisory services, credited Pediatrix's audit committee for conducting a comprehensive investigation. But ISS plans to do its own research before reaching any conclusions.

ISS will seek to learn the board's reasoning for excusing Medel from ''any further discipline,'' ISS' Patrick McGurn said.

It will then make recommendations on whether those directors deserve reelection, McGurn said.

''This is a board-accountability issue,'' McGurn said

Sleepless in San Francisco

2007-08-03T03:26:00.001-07:00

About a month ago I provided some comments for a Men's Health piece about "finding men" in San Francisco, and I told the writers that we have a pretty exciting dating scene here in The City. Amusingly, the authors ran my response to what they termed the "the gay question." Which would have been a little less confusing if they'd actually asked me "the gay question." Whatever it is.
Gay mystery questions about straight people being single in San Francisco aside, I think the dating scene here is as complex and romantic as our atmosphere. No matter what neighborhood you flirt in, it's impossible to escape our cool air of dark mystery, as seen in every filmic rendition of The City from "The Maltese Falcon" and "Vertigo," to "Jade" and "Interview With a Vampire." There's a reason films like this are set here, though you don't have to think like a vampire to get nibbled on after dark. But if you want to, we certainly won't judge you.

Of course, unless you're a Web 2.0 dweeb like me, that means you actually have to leave the house to meet someone. One of my maxims for meeting people is "half of having a life is showing up," and the San Francisco fog leaves even the vampiest with little excuse not to get out and look for fresh blood -- of all kinds.

San Francisco, even at a glance, is a city full of interesting people looking to meet other interesting people, because so many people move here from somewhere else, seeking art, technology, education, fortune, and yes, sexual tolerance. With our high concentration of sex writers, bloggers and educators, it's tough not to feel the amour everywhere you turn. There are many places to flirt and meet other singles in The City; below are a few favorites.

You don't have to go to a bar, like the rest of the herd. Third Thursdays at the California Academy of Sciences are turning into one tasty mixer; on this evening the aquarium is open with a cocktail bar set up in the back. (Hello, penguins!) DJs spin beats and people mingle and linger at the turtle tank and other curious exhibits. Or, go the seriously brainy route and visit a local tech salon; Nerd Salon or Dorkbot SF, which feature geeky presentations and opportunities to meet a variety of tech professionals. And, of course, when you don't feel like leaving the coffin ... er, computer, for fresh meat, you can keep up with the wealth of ways to meet art and tech culture types by following the Squid List.

Should you feel the need to go outdoors to mingle and flirt, hit beautiful, always-summery Dolores Park; gorgeous, bayside Aquatic Park; and possibly the best daytime hookup spot (and daytime date spot) the Ferry Building Marketplace, particularly on Farmer's Market Saturdays, when it's teeming with shoppers, sexy and otherwise.

Of course, if you did choose to go the usual routes for flirtiness in The City, you'd certainly be rewarded for your efforts. But we do things just a little bit differently around these parts. Speed dating? Check. But while anyone can go to corporate-flavored 8-Minute Dating events at the Metreon, why not try our uniquely San Francisco version (complete with dating game show), Crush Lab? Online dating? eHarmony is a yawn compared to what the locals like about Tribe.net, Pownce and even Flickr -- which, while not a social networking site, has resulted in the meeting of more than a few San Francisco couples.

Trendy upscale bars? If you must. We've got 'em in every neighborhood complete with cutting-edge design and fun specialty cocktails. You can hook up with urban professionals over cocktails at Lazlo or Medjool in the Mission, 111 Minna has DJ'd book parties with artist Tim Biskup and more mingling-ready nooks and crannies than a Gama-Go sketch. Meet hip singles at quirky Bigfoot Lodge in Nob Hill, Spanish-inspired Cigar Bar in Jackson Square, and of course, everyone knows about NOPA. I'll add, however, in case you're a single straight man new to The City and you're reading this, going to the Castro District to meet girls in its trendy bars is not really going to work out the way you planned.

Date in hand, where next to flirt in San Francisco? Cable cars can really mess up a girl's hair. And Fisherman's Wharf is great for dates -- if your idea of romance is Hooters. Instead, creep into one of our darkly romantic restaurants for a bite; Absinthe in Hayes Valley feels like an upper class parlor; sprawl out on mattresses at the trendy Supperclub in SOMA; watch a movie under the stars in Foreign Cinema's Mission courtyard; or enter a sultan's caravan at the notoriously sexy El Mansour in the Richmond District.

Every Sunday closest to the full moon, there's the prix fixe full moon aphrodisiac feasts for two at gourmet Millennium -- also offering an entire aphrodisiac package with their upstairs neighbor, the Savoy Hotel. Don't forget the sweetly cheesy velvet booths with a (stunning) view and superb cocktails at Harry Denton's Starlight Room, which make any outing a spot-the-lounge-lizard event with unfailingly romantic overtones.

Cupcakes are sexy, and nowhere are they sexier than the lounge-with-a-view at Citizen Cupcake downtown (soju cocktails or champagne -- or tea), or Miette's Ferry Building counter by the Bay -- where you can get a cake and hit the wine bar or benches with a view of Treasure Island. Take your date to Golden Gate Park's Japanese Tea Garden for a stunning sip, Musee Mechanique for some of our stranger history (and a game of vintage pinball), Teatro Zinzanni for Barbary Coast style dinner theater, or walk out to the Wave Organ -- with its view from the Golden Gate to Oakland, it's one of The City's top make-out spots.

And that gay question? If you know what it is, feel free to ask me.

The Pros of Internet Dating

2007-08-03T03:25:00.000-07:00

The Internet has revolutionized the way we do so many things in our daily lives. From sending emails instead of letters, to doing your banking online, and more recently, how it has changed the way we encounter future relationships. Online dating is quickly becoming one of the most popular ways for adults to meet other adults for dating or friendship. Not only is Internet dating very fast, convenient, and fun, but it is also relatively inexpensive. Here are just a few reasons why online dating has become so popular.

1) Online Dating Is Convenient

With most of us leading such busy lives, there is hardly any time left in the day to do anything. With a full time job, errands to run, and a busy social life, not many of us have the time to go out dancing all night just to meet other people. Online dating can be done at any time, in the comfort of your own home. You don't even need to dress up. As long as you have a good profile, and a nice picture, no one is going to notice if you chat to them whilst wearing your daggy clothes.

2) Online Dating Is Fun

Online dating doesn't have to be a serious business. It can certainly be a lot of fun, and a very enjoyable experience. Chatting to people of different ages, backgrounds, and cultures, you have no obligations, and the risk is relatively small.

3) Online Dating Is Fast

You could end up meeting the person of your dreams in less than one week. Browse through thousands of profiles in some of the most popular dating sites, and you could easily set yourself up on multiple dates in the same week.

4) Online Dating Is Relatively Inexpensive

My friend used to be a member of a real life dating agency. They would charge him thousands of dollars each month to be set on dates with other girls. Online dating is much cheaper because the running costs are very small for the business owner. This is a great thing because the savings are passed onto the customers.

Online dating used to be very unpopular when the Internet first started appearing. However, as time went on and more people discovered that it was actually a very useful and fun way to meet people, it started to bloom and blossom. If you are seeking a friend, or a life long partner, perhaps you should try giving online dating a try. Who knows, you might even meet someone that makes your life a much more pleasant experience.

Why Do So Many People Date Online?

2007-08-03T03:24:00.001-07:00

Once upon a time, online dating was a last resort, a joke of sorts for singles. Today, that is no longer the case. Millions of singles are now looking online for relationships. The reasons behind this new trend in dating are numerous.

Money Never Has and Never Will Grow on Trees.

The first reason people are turning to online dating is the relatively low cost of the services. Compared to the costs of transportation, grooming, and dining for a blind date, a few dollars a month to an online dating firm is cheap. Online dating allows singles to evaluate their matches and to get to know them before shelving out hard earned dough.

Must I Really Comb My Hair For This?

Comfort and convenience is the second reason online dating has become so popular. While it is generally done at home for privacy reasons, online dating can be done twenty-four hours a day from anywhere a person can access the Internet. No make-up or new hairstyle is required. When in the comfort of your own home, there is no dress code and bathing, although preferred in case of emergency, is optional.

Being able to meet new people in the confines of their own homes is also a huge plus for singles and divorcees living with children. They can mingle without having to hire a babysitter.

Only 24 Hours in a Day.

Why waste two of them talking to a guy who thinks all unforgettable, classic movies feature The Rock or to a girl who can't name the United States Secretary of State but can list twenty colors of red nail polish? With the screening features provided by online dating services, you're able to sift through the vast selection of singles and narrow down the pool to people who match your criteria.

Stupid is as Stupid Does.

Despite popular beliefs, online dating is not unsafe. It is in fact, as anonymous and safe, as a user wants it to be. Statistics reveal that it is just as safe as conventional dating, perhaps even safer as online daters don't feel the need to invade the crazy, sometimes dangerous, bar scenes. As long as online daters exercise common sense as they should do even when dating in the conventional manner, they should have safe dates. It would be ridiculous to assume that one can play with a live beehive and not get stung.

A Happily Ever After For Me Too?

Online dating success stories are everywhere from CNN to Oprah. By itself alone, match.com recognizes an estimated 130 engagements and/or marriages each month as a result of its services. Other dating sites quote similar high figures. Daters see these numbers and want their own happy endings.

Online dating is inexpensive, convenient, safe, and proven successful. Nobody wants to be alone; no one should. With online dating, you don't have to be.

Prince dating identical twins - report

2007-08-03T03:23:00.001-07:00

Prince is dating a set of identical Caribbean twins, it has been claimed.

The Purple Rain singer - who is to play a series of shows at London's The O2 arena starting from this week - has been romantically linked to his backing vocalists, the exotic duo Twinz.

Twinz - who refuse to reveal their real names or ages - won't confirm if their intimate on stage relationship with Prince continues once the show is over.

The stunning singers said teasingly: "Prince is a huge fan of ours. He is someone who likes to have beautiful women around him."

They added: "He is a cool cat, always dressed to impress. And he keeps us laughing all the time." Prince - who has previously been romantically linked to Sheena Easton, Carmen Electra and Susanna Hoffs of The Bangles, has been married twice - to dancer Mayte Garcia and Manuela Testolini.

The diminutive singer is said to have a mesmerising effect on the opposite sex - Kim Basinger's brother was once forced to whisk her away from the singer's house.

Prince, who once described sex as the "most important thing in the world", allegedly requested his Los Angeles hotel penthouse suite was re-carpeted with white shag and decorated with a huge purple Prince logo on the wall for the duration of his stay.

Dating didn't work, so they'll try casual sex

2007-08-03T03:21:00.000-07:00

If you're capable of drawing a boundary around your emotions, including insecurity and jealousy, then the "arrangement" might work, at least for those four months.

If you're trying to play at being a couple by having casual sex when one of you really wants more (could that be you?), you could get hurt when you two go your different ways again.

DEAR ELLIE: My close girlfriend started dating someone a year ago who has anger problems. He has left visible bruises on her. After one such incident, I left him a voice message to stay away from her (she'd said she wanted him gone), and warned that otherwise I'd report him to the police. He must've played the message to her, as she then cut me and other friends off.

Eventually, her mother reported him for physical abuse, he was arrested and, because he wasn't a legal immigrant, he was deported to his home country. My girlfriend decided not to press charges.

Now, she has started to reconnect with her friends, but she's planning to visit him and is even considering marrying him. Any advice for me?

Torn

DEAR TORN: As a friend, you should let her know that if she wants your support, you're available. Inform yourself of resources, such as an abused women's help line to get her directed to safe shelter and counseling.

DEAR ELLIE: We've lived together five years, but now my husband of one year and I are touchy with each other. I discovered he'd e-mailed a female co-worker, saying he missed her and couldn't wait for her return to work. He was helping her with her bad marriage and claims he wrote it to make her feel better. He promised he'd end the friendship.

However, he's being secretive, carries his cell phone everywhere and barely talks to me. I know he's not cheating because he's always home. He does all this because I invaded his privacy. How do we regain each other's trust?

Lace Rose Allenius: Topless, Sexual, & Dating Matt Dillon? Maybe Not

2007-08-03T03:20:00.000-07:00

Lace Rose Allenius topless 'adult' photos may not have been revealed while interning at ABC News, but they are now - and she may have been dating Matt Dillon for 2 years.

Sources are claiming Lace Rose Allenius and Matt Dillon have been dating for two years - but other sources are claiming they are no longer together

The source claims: "She's been dating Matt Dillon for about two years."

Other "reliable sources" told the NY Daily News the couple is no longer together.

Lace Rose Allenius' sexy adult and partially nude photos can be viewed here.

The dating game comes to Fenway

2007-08-03T03:16:00.000-07:00

It's taken awhile, but the new Sox-centered dating show from the creators of "Queer Eye" is finally ready. Originally set to premiere in mid-July, the first episode of "Sox Appeal" will air after tomorrow's Sox/Orioles game on NESN. The show, which was filmed at Fenway and produced by NESN and Scout Productions, focuses on a guy or girl -- "the hero" -- and three prospective partners. (Each wannabe gets two innings of attention and then, during the seventh-inning stretch, the person playing the field decides which of the three contenders they want to watch the rest of the game with.) "It's good and funny," swears Scout's Eric Korsh, the show's executive producer. "It's not a show about humiliation. We're not trying to make fun of people." Although Sox chairman Tom Werner has an impressive TV track record -- he was the brains behind "Roseanne," "The Cosby Show," and "That '70s Show" -- he wasn't involved in making "Sox Appeal." (We're told that he and Sox owner John Henry have seen the first episode, which features former figure skater Garrett Lucash, left, but don't blame them if it's no good.) Asked if any of the couples on the show have a future after Fenway, Korsh was optimistic. "That'd be awesome," he said.

Yesterday's storms couldn't keep Sox players Tim Wakefield and Jason Varitek off the links at swanky Black Rock in Hingham, where they joined a couple of hundred other golf fans to raise money for their Pitching in for Kids Foundation. Also braving the weather were Doug Flutie, Hizzoner Tom Menino, Sox hurler Mike Timlin, former Sox players Troy O'Leary and Jim Lonborg, and Dropkick Murphys singer Ken Casey. While the athletes each tried to hit a $1 million hole-in-one for the charity, the chatter was less about the quality of shots than news that the Celtics and Minnesota Timberwolves were working on a trade that could get Kevin Garnett wearing the Boston green.

Musical celebration for Hard Rock Cafe
Aaron Lewis, frontman of Boston's alt-metal band Staind, will perform at a bash next Tuesday for the opening of the relocated Hard Rock Cafe at Faneuil Hall. Other rock types are expected to strut down the red carpet, including Aerosmith drummer Joey Kramer, record producer and Black Label Society guitarist Zakk Wylde, and Anthrax axman Scott Ian.

Film seeks office space
Annette Bening, Candice Bergen, Meg Ryan, and the rest of the cast of "The Women" will be in town mid-month to begin filming Diane English's remake of the Hollywood classic. Among the locations nailed down are a sprawling Dover house and its spectacular kitchen, but scouts are still scouring downtown Boston for the perfect high-end office space. If a suitable space can be found, the filmmakers have told local film industry reps they will shoot even more of the movie -- which also stars Eva Mendes, Jada Pinkett Smith, and Debra Messing -- in the Boston area. Word from the West Coast is that "Desperate Housewives" diva Nicollette Sheridan is in talks to join the cast.

Ever wonder where chef Ming Tsai goes to get away from the glare of the cameras? For Boston magazine's "Best of Boston" issue, editors asked local celebs for their picks. Tsai heads to the raucous Chicken Bone on Waverly Street in Framingham to unwind. "The Office" writer-actor B.J. Novak of Newton picks the IHOP in Brighton as his "go-to chain restaurant." Chef Todd English recommends Tumi in Copley Place for luggage. NESN anchor Hazel Mae splurges on footwear at Jimmy Choo. And "Little Children" author Tom Perrotta suggests Full Moon on Huron Avenue in Cambridge as the place to take the family.Article Tools

Amber Madison (inset) will never be mistaken for Dr. Ruth Westheimer, but the 23-year-old Tufts grad has a similar gig. Today, Madison, who lives in Somerville, is launching AmberMadi son.TV, a Web-based video channel featuring straight, informative talk about -- you guessed it -- sex. "One thing I love about this medium is the freedom we have to think about content," said Madison, who made headlines last fall with her book "Hooking Up: A Girl's All-Out Guide to Sex & Sexuality." Taped in LA, the programming on AmberMadison.TV deals with everything from body image to contraception.

They're the bitter ones
What's with those Devil Rays' radio announcers? The play-by-play pair resorted to name-calling during the Bosox series in Tampa. The tandem of Andy Freed and Dave Wills referred to Kevin Youkilis's "Bitter Beer Face" when the first baseman didn't like an umpire's call. What's that? According to urbandictionary .com, it's the puckered expression made by people unaccustomed to alcohol. Freed, a former PawSox announcer, must wear a Bitter Beer Face all the time watching the dreadful D-Rays.

Singing a new tune
KT Tunstall was in town flacking for her new CD yesterday. The Scottish singer played a short set for WBOS listeners at First Act Guitar Studio and then headed over to the Colonnade Hotel, where cloudy skies nixed a planned pool party. There, Tunstall told MIX 98.5 listeners about the time she met White Stripes screamer Jack White at a recent rock festival. "He gave me a hug and I went very red," she said.

Breathe
'Somebody needs to teach you some class, my friend.' Singer Faith Hill, to an audience member who grabbed her husband, Tim McGraw, in the groin during a concert in Louisiana.

Pete Doherty Comes Clean on Dating Kate Moss

2007-08-03T03:15:00.000-07:00

After a period of relative calm in the saga of Kate Moss and her on-again-off-again boyfriend Pete Doherty, the drama is back.

Doherty used Tuesday's edition of the U.K.'s Daily Mirror to profess his love and desire to be with Moss again.

"I love her with all my heart," he told the newspaper. "I like the way she walks and talks. I love her bones. I love her brain." He claims he has no other way of reaching her.

He goes on to say their tempestuous relationship was marred by the fact she is a jealous "nasty old rag" with a violent temper, and claims she once kicked him in the head.

On Wednesday, he elaborated on the reasons for their breakup, telling the Mirror that Moss went "ballistic" when they settled in one night to watch a DVD trailer for a feature-length film about Doherty.

When images of him flirting with groupies appeared on the screen, he says that Moss accused him of cheating and kicked him out of her home "for good."

Meanwhile, the newly blonde Doherty tells The Sun that dating Moss was like being on the front line. He contradicts earlier claims by saying he left her and doesn't want her back.

The couple split up last month. On July 4, movers were spotted at Moss's London home removing furniture and guitars, a piano, paintings and suitcases.

"The last six weeks of our relationship were bad. We had one massive bust-up and it carried on from there," he said. "I was always dodging bullets ... [it] became like the Vietnam war."

Doherty has battled drug addiction for years and has had numerous run-ins with police for drug offenses. Last month he admitted in court to possessing quantities of crack cocaine, heroin, cannabis and ketamine as well as to two driving infractions.

Moss, 33, and Doherty, 28, have dated off and on for more than two years, and he claimed in memoirs published in June that they would wed this summer if he could stay drug-free.

Singles Participate In 8-Minute Dating

2007-08-03T03:14:00.001-07:00

So! Apparently women have become more masculine. Well, that is what a group of guys recently told me. Yeah, I know, it sounds ridiculous as you first read it, but let’s explore the hypothesis a little bit.

Since those caveman days, men haven’t quite let go of some of their ideals about women. It’s understandable, though, because women still hold similar traditional ideals about men. Women still expect men to be men, protect us, and provide a boatload of things, that men are (for the most part), only happy to provide. It makes them feel like men! While some things have changed in our society, many things remain the same. Men like their dames to act like ladies!

Modern women and men face quite a daunting task of finding their new gender roles in dating and relationships. One of the complaints modern men have about women is that we forfeit too much femininity. Some men feel that girly women have become extinct.

How does that impact our modern dating practices? Well, a few guys told me that some of them wonder if the women they meet know how “to behave like a real lady”, which apparently is extremely subjective. None of the men I asked had the same answer to my question, what is a real lady?

Do men think women need to be more girly? I think I have girly moments - those times when I know my feminine power, and use it for good (well, most of the time!) - but I doubt I play up to any stereotypes that men may have about girly women.

Ladies, do you feel that modern women are too masculine? Do you think this impacts your dating experiences?

Lonely man falls for Nigerian dating scam

2007-08-03T03:12:00.001-07:00

RICHMOND -- Most people have heard of the notorious Nigerian e-mail scam, but at least one person has now been taken in by a Nigerian dating scam.

Police in Richmond received a complaint from a man who was stood up by his Internet girlfriend after he sent her $2,000 US to buy a plane ticket from Nigeria to Vancouver International Airport.

"The male complainant advised that he went through an Internet dating service and found a girl on the site," said Richmond RCMP Cpl. Nycki Basra. "The female gave her name as Kelly Gabriel and advised that she lives in Nigeria."

She told the man that she wanted to come to Vancouver to meet him but needed money for the airfare. So he sent it, and the woman told him that she would be arriving via a flight from Murtala, Nigeria, that was non-existent.

"Members of the public should be very wary of information they receive and transmit via the Internet, especially if there is any transfer of money," Basra added.

Match.com Expands Mobile Dating Service

2007-08-03T03:11:00.000-07:00

NEW YORK (Reuters) - Online dating service Match.com is launching a new application for cell phones, allowing subscribers to keep track of their paramours while on the go.

MatchMobile will first be made available in the United States, UK and Canadian markets, with plans to extend the service to nine more countries by the end of the year.

The service provides subscribers with text messages to their phones when they have an e-mail from another Match.com subscriber and allows them to search for potential matches from their cell phones.

For an extra fee of about $5 per month, MatchMobile subscribers can receive and answer e-mails from suitors on their mobile phones.

"If you are having a conversation with someone and want to continue it on the go, you can. It cuts out the waiting," Match.com Chief Executive Thomas Enraght-Moony told Reuters. "As people become more and more accustomed to being able to do things while they are on the go, this becomes a more natural part of what they do."

An earlier version of Match.com for mobile phones was used by nearly half a million subscribers, Enraght-Moony said. The new application will allow subscribers to tap into Match.com's database of nearly 15 million registered users.

About 3.6 million U.S. cell phones subscribers used a mobile dating service in May this year, according to data from tracking firm M:Metrics that was provided by Match.com. The company also cited forecasts from Frost & Sullivan, which predict that revenue from mobile dating services will grow to $215 million by 2009.

On Hardball, Melanie Morgan claimed Bill Clinton "is still dating"

2007-08-03T03:10:00.000-07:00

On the July 31 edition of MSNBC's Hardball with Chris Matthews, guest host Mike Barnicle asked right-wing radio host Melanie Morgan, "[W]hat's your matchup for the biggest spouse in the race on either side, Bill Clinton?" to which Morgan replied, "Well, I think that [Sen.] Hillary's [Clinton (D-NY)] wife, Bill, is going to be a detriment, unfortunately, to Mrs. Clinton, because it's going to be a situation where, since he's still dating, it's obviously going to be a detraction, I think, from the race. So that's going to be problematic for Mrs. Clinton." Morgan added, "Plus, you know, you are going to have to hire private detectives to keep an eye on him, and so forth. And that's going to be a difficulty."

Later, Morgan asserted that Jeri Thompson, wife of possible Republican presidential candidate and former Sen. Fred Thompson (R-TN), "is aware of something that other women don't seem to get on the liberal side of the equation, that we are fighting a battle against terrorism that really has our very culture and our lives at stake." Morgan also claimed Jeri Thompson understands "that global warming is a hoax."

From the July 31 edition of MSNBC's Hardball with Chris Matthews:

BARNICLE: Melanie, let me ask you, what's your matchup for the biggest spouse in the race on either side, Bill Clinton?

MORGAN: Well, I think that Hillary's wife, Bill, is going to be a detriment, unfortunately, to Mrs. Clinton, because it's going to be a situation where, since he's still dating, it's obviously going to be a detraction, I think, from the race. So, that's going to be problematic for Mrs. Clinton.

Plus, you know, you are going to have to hire private detectives to keep an eye on him, and so forth. And that's going to be a difficulty.

On our side, though, I think that Jeri Thompson is going to be a spectacular asset to her husband, should he decide to get into the race. I think that Mrs. Thompson --

BARNICLE: Why -- why would she be an asset, because she is great-looking?

MORGAN: Because she is smart, accomplished. She's an attorney. She's gorgeous, that's true. That always helps.

Plus, she is aware of something that other women don't seem to get on the liberal side of the equation, that we are fighting a battle against terrorism that really has our very culture and our lives at stake.

And, so, I think that she will also understand that -- and she does understand the fact --

BARNICLE: Yes, but that -- that gets --

MORGAN: -- that global warming is a hoax and all the other tax issues that are very important.

Is Your Wife Dating Ted Turner?

2007-08-03T03:06:00.000-07:00

Pulitzer Prize-winning author Robert Olen Butler sent around an e-mail telling colleagues that his wife was leaving him for Ted Turner, Page Six is reporting. You can't make this stuff up!

In the e-mail -- which Butler says he sent with the consent of his soon-to-be ex-wife, Elizabeth Dewberry -- Butler wrote that Dewberry was "molested by her grandfather from an early age" and that "it is very common for a woman to be drawn to men who remind them of their childhood abusers." Creepy!

Butler went on to say that Dewberry "will not be Ted's only girlfriend. Ted is permanently and avowedly non-monogamous." Seriously, you can't make this stuff up. Creepy!

Things To Avoid At Your First Date

2007-08-03T03:05:00.000-07:00

Finally, after a year of mending a broken heart, you come out of your shell and announce to your friends that you are ready to meet other people.

However, after several years of having a steady date, you find yourself feeling eerie going back to dating. It's like you're clueless. You can't recall what your first date like with your ex- partner (or you intend not to recall). And you really want to make it right this time.

At the midst of your apprehension, your friend calls you and excitedly announced to you that she got you a date. She talks nonstop about how gorgeous this guy is and went on to endless list of this guy's achievement and best features. Meanwhile, your thoughts had drifted to your many anxieties on having your first date ever after a major break-up.

You are afraid that you might screw it up. That the guy may not be as good as your former. That you will be tongue-tied the entire time you are together. Perhaps, you may never have any thing to say to him. That you might become a lousy date. Or you are never really be prepared on going back to the dating game yet.

Don't fret. You are not alone. Many have gone through the jitters too. And it is usual. Don't be too hard on yourself by backing out just because you fell like you can't make it. It's just a matter of knowing what to avoid to make your date click.

Here are the EIGHT COMMANDMENTS OF DATING to the rescue.

1. Thou shall not be late

Do all the necessary preparations ahead of time. I suggest that a night before the big day, choose your outfit already. So, that you won't hurry dressing up for your date. You don't want your partner to see you wearing the wrong pair of earrings. Make sure that when your guy knocks on your door, you are all set. Cramming is one disaster risk factor. So, be careful not to cram. Having your date stand for 10 minutes on your day will not create a nice impression.

2. Thou shall not narrate break-up history on thy date.

For God's sake don't do this. You are supposed to have fun and not sour grape over your most recent break-up. And besides, past is past, bury them all on the ground and start anew. Your date is suppose to be a new prospect, not a shock absorber. Your friends have that role already. Instead of dwelling in the past, know this new guy in front of you more. Ask him about his stuff like - what he does, his kind of sports, hobbies, interests and more until such time you arrive at your common interest. Little do you know, that you have been talking for three hours straight and enjoying every minute of it.

3. Thou shall not be tongue- tied

Don't let your date ask you where your mouth is because you cannot think of anything to say. Or there's something wrong with you because your answers are all monosyllables. Let him get to know you better. Tell him what you do on your work, on your free time, your favorite activities, sports and stuff. You can initiate a conversation to impress him more. Men want their women to be witty and sensible.

4. Thou shall not compare

The man in front of you is totally a different individual. It will be unfair to pattern him to your previous guy or make a note of comparison. What you should do is discover this new person in front of you and forget the past guy even his name if you wish to. Comparison as your standards will not put you anywhere. It will just make your date a disaster. And please, do not dare verbalize your notes of comparison with your date.

5. Thou shall not come in thy worst appearance.

Hey, you are dating because you want to hook up with the right guy this time. So, you have to create a good impression. Don't make your date run away from you because you look like you've come from another planet with your dress, haven't taken a bath for days and smell like garbage. Be on your best attire. Look good and smell fresh. That way, you can captivate his attention the entire time you are together. And he'll be proud of you as a date.

6. Thou shall not be silly.

The worst thing you can be is looking silly. Do not talk things as if you're a pro if in reality you are clueless. You would end up saying the wrong things that will confuse your date a lot. Look smart. If you happen to be unaware of what he's saying about the sports hockey, ask him questions. He will even be amused because you are paying interest on what he is talking about.

7. Thou shall not be aloof

Guys will be uncomfortable if they notice that their date seems to be aloof with them. Remember, it is both your first time to see each other. So, he is equally nervous about your date. Don't make him feel more nervous by being distant. Let him feel that you intend to enjoy the night with him. Be friendly enough to give him your sweet smile. Don't give him a cold shoulder. If he feels that you welcome his presence, he'd be motivated to ask you for another date.

8. Thou shall not be nervous

Don't worry too much on having a great date instead enjoy your date. If you feel nervous, you're most likely to shake. It will be embarrassing if your date caught you holding a glass shaking. Don't be over powered with his presence. Show him you can manage yourself well. Be confident. Look straight in his eyes when you answer his questions. Flash your best smile. Amuse him with your wits and looks. Guys love women who are empowered.

Early local public school reports dating back to 1867

2007-08-03T03:04:00.000-07:00

Although scattered attempts were made toward comprehensive public education in Robertson County prior to the Civil War, it was not until 1867 that a law creating a public school for all citizens was passed. General John Eaton was appointed as the superintendent of public instruction in Tennessee. George W. Walker was appointed by Eaton as Robertson County’s superintendent of public instruction. He served until the position was abolished by the State Legislature in December 1869. He was followed by James L. Watts, 1873-76; W. C. Denson, 1876-79; W. L. Haynie, 1879-83; P. D. West, 1883-85; B. F. Fyke, 1885-87, J.E. Ruffin, 1887-1895. The following are reports submitted to the state regarding public education in Robertson during these years.

Taken from First Report of the Superintendent of Public Instruction of the State of Tennessee, by John Eaton, Jr.

The Organization of free schools for the universal education of the people, has, by Divine favor, been effected in Tennessee. The revised school law was passed 5 March 1867. It required: the election of School Directors in each Civil District on the first Saturday in June, 1867; the duties of Directors included, the taking of an enumeration of all the white and black youths, between the ages of six and twenty, resident within the District; the scholastic population should be reported to the County Superintendent on or before the first day of September; each Civil District should have a Board of Directors; these Directors would hold regular sessions twice a year; School house were to be procured and opened for black and white students, separately, throughout the State and reports made by the Clerks to County Superintendents to be forwarded to the State Superintendent.

The old school law allocated State money to the counties, but they were allowed to charge tuition to students. However, in many counties, when the State money received was exhausted, the schools were either completely closed or the pupils who could not pay tuition were sent home. Such schools were often called pauper schools. Under the new 1867 law, the school must be “free as air to all of legal age.”

The Civil War found few good free school houses and all of any quality suffered injury or destruction in its sweep. School houses built before the war were located on lands held by private parties. Sixty-three counties up to 12 July 1869 reported 221 school sites and the erection of 385 school houses.

Robertson County, July 13th, 1869. – If I could have drawn the money due from the apportionment of 1867, so as to have paid the teachers as soon as their schools were out, there would have been no difficulty at all in organizing the schools of the county.

1867 Robertson Co. Scholastic Population: 1937 White Males, 1830 White Females, 588 Black Males, 554 Black Females.

1868 Robertson Co. Scholastic Population: 2022 White Males, 1890 White Females, 655 Black Males, 665 Black Females.

1869 Robertson Co. Scholastic Population: 2074 White males, 1934 White Females, 690 Black Males, 691 Black Females.

Reported by G.W. Walker, Supt.

Robertson County School Directors appointed 1867-1869: Adams Station: D.T. Johnson, J. M. Fort, T. M. Jackson - clerk; Barren Plains: Dempsey Taylor, Preston Holland, J.B. Taylor – clerk; Black Jack: Charles Howard, John N. Brewer, John N. Brewer - clerk; Cedar Hill: T.G. Strange, Enos W. Gunn, B.H. Boon - clerk, J.J. Barnes, W.J. Harris, Josiah Farmer – clerk; Coopertown: C.F. Miller, M.C. Orman, W.A. Moore - clerk; Cross Plains: J. C. Holman, J.T.M. Taylor, J.M. Wright - clerk; Fort’s Station: M.D. Killebrew, S.H. Gullett, Josiah W. Fort – clerk; Greenbrier: Jesse Fulbright, John Briggs, John Phillips - clerk; Mitchellville: Wm Johnson, Richard Baird, Samuel Byram; Springfield: J.W. Shelton, Ephriam Farthing, W.R. Eddings - clerk, George Benton, John Bridge , D.P. Braden - clerk, H.M. Pitt, George Pitt, B.F. Baggett - clerk, J.C. Strickland, W.A. Cole, W.D. M. Durritt - clerk, H. Rigon, J.W. Spain; Sumnersville: A. Adkins, J.S. Williams, J.T. Ryan -clerk; Turnersville: W.T. Bracy, H.F. White, G.W. Ellis – clerk.

1875 Report taken from Annual Report of the State Superintendent of Schools for Tennessee for the Scholastic Year ending August 31, 1875, submitted by Leon Trousdale, State Superintendent.

Robertson County: James L. Watts, Superintendent, Springfield.

The Superintendent reports: The success of our schools is gradually growing from year to year.

A series of textbooks has been adopted and is being introduced into the schools, as new books are bought. There are no graded schools in the county. All schools have blackboards, or about all; none have globes or charts. There is not much interest manifested in the schools by Directors or citizens. About one-fourth of our teachers are well-qualified; the qualification of about one-half is medium, and that of the remainder not good, or in other words, poor. There are several good new houses erected, partly from private means and partly from the school fund. The majority of the houses are good, but some are poor.

We have no Institute. I would prefer those teachers who would attend an Institute to those who would not, and would favor such compulsion as that. The want of money is the great obstacle to success. Public sentiment in the main is favorable to free schools, and is increasing in that direction. The discipline of the schools is good. Schools open at different times during the year.

Students: 2074 White Male, 1,880 White Female, 844 Black Male, 828 Black Female

Teachers: 32 White Male, 6 White Female, 11 Black Male, 4 Black Female

2.4 months instruction, Average Teacher compensation $37.95

877 Reports: Robertson County, W.C. Denson, County Superintendent, Springfield.

Public schools are gaining somewhat in favor with the people, I think, but not sufficiently yet to give us an increase of funds with which to improve their general condition. There have been no special manifestations of interest that I can mention, save that the little “leaven” is within the great lump, and is slowly but surely doing its work.

Students: 2,027 White Males, 1,868 White Females, 873 Black Males, 776 Black Females

Teachers: 27 White Male, 5 White Female, 6 Black Male, 5 Black Female

Schools: 28 White, 11 Black

Average of 85 days of class; Average Teacher compensation $35 per year; Tuition $1 per month

Buildings: 3 stone or brick; 20 frame, 20 log

Cheatham County – T.J. Adkisson, County Superintendent, Ashland City

[The former Superintendent, Mr. Geo. F. Murff, resigned about the 1st of October, 1877, when his report was due, without any effort to make it, and his successor, Mr. Adkisson, had much difficulty in collecting any data upon which to make his report, which was consequently very unsatisfactory. But from the zeal and energy he has displayed, since his induction into the office, it is confidently believed that the listless condition in which he found the school interests of the County will soon be changed, and that hereafter activity and vigilance will prevail, and systematic, correct reports will be regularly returned.]

If you have photographs of any of these school superintendents mentioned in this article, please contact the Robertson County Archives (382-6928) or the Robertson County History Museum (382-7173).

Getting connected

2007-08-03T03:02:00.000-07:00

How did you start online dating?

I've been a single mum for seven years and I've been online dating for the past four years on Match, Plenty of Fish and RSVP. I thought I'd never do internet dating - it seemed so desperate. Then my girlfriend joined RSVP and I went on to see her profile and found some nice-looking guys, so I decided to create a profile. Since then, I've had more than 3000 kisses, which are what people send you when they want to make contact. Now I can go out to a bar and talk to anyone. I've built that confidence through internet dating.

What profile names have you used?

I've been YummyMummy, GirlsJustWantToHaveFun, BeesKnees, HotChilliPepper - the way you portray yourself is the way people will respond. One of my headlines was "Wanted: Meaningful Overnight Relationship"; I got 30 kisses in one day and all of them were looking for a fling.

How did you make it to No. 1 on RSVP?

In the beginning I didn't know what I was doing. I put in a daggy photo of myself and a boring profile. Then I started looking at the girls in the top 100 - they had nice make-up and hair, and a seductive look. So I changed my photo and wrote an alluring poem and six guys wanted to meet me in one weekend.

How do you attract the right person online?

Before you interact with people you have to know what you want. I made myself a top 10 list of what I wanted in a partner. If you want someone who is honest, you have to be honest to attract someone on that level. Write your profile through your "heart centre" and it will resonate with someone else.

Does email tell you enough about a person?

When somebody contacts you, their first email will give you a good idea of who they are - the words, the tone, how much they write. If it's a really full page of their life it's usually a cut-and-paste job.

How do you spot dodgy sorts?

If somebody has limited info and no photo, they're up to no good - they're either married, have something to hide or they are really ugly.

Do profiles take away the mystery?

I put a video up once - a fun comedy routine. Lots of guys emailed me to say they loved my sense of humour but they didn't want to meet me. My profile showed so much of my personality, the mystery was gone. Sometimes less is best.

Mother's Charges Depend On Dating Fetal Remains

2007-08-03T03:01:00.000-07:00

OCEAN CITY, Md. -- Investigators working on the case of a Maryland mother who allegedly secreted dead fetuses around her home have a task that could stretch the bounds of even fictional forensic specialists on a television show.

As FBI and local searchers finished Wednesday a three-day search of 37-year-old Christy Freeman's home, state medical examiners have a daunting task with the four sets of fetal remains already recovered.

First, they must determine whether all four fetuses belong to Freeman, mother of four living children and owner of a taxicab company now held without bond in the death of a 26-week-old fetus police discovered under her bathroom sink last week.

Then investigators need to find out how old the fetuses were when they died, when they died -- and whether Freeman or someone else was responsible for their dying before birth.

The timing in Freeman's case is critical. If the fetuses discovered were too young to be considered viable outside the womb, Freeman can't be charged with murder. And if they were old enough to live outside the womb, but died before Maryland passed a 2005 law authorizing murder charges against someone who kills a viable fetus, it may not be a crime even if Freeman caused their deaths.

Prosecutors and police concede it could take months to sort out all the physical evidence and determine what charges, if any, may be appropriate for Freeman if the three sets of older fetal remains found in her home and Winnebago belonged to her.

Ocean City Police Chief Bernadette DiPino cited the delicate investigation ahead Tuesday when she explained to reporters why searchers went through dirt from a vacant lot next to Freeman's home shovel by shovel.

"We need to gather as much evidence as we can," she said. Talking about the prosecutor, State's Attorney Joel Todd, she added, "he's going to have a challenging case as it is."

Investigators completed their search of Freeman's yard and the vacant lot Tuesday and wrapped up their work Wednesday with another search of the home she shared with longtime boyfriend, Raymond W. Godman Jr.

Godman has not been named a suspect in the case and was staying with the couple's four children at a friend's house, said Ocean City Police Spokesman Barry Neeb.

Four investigators spent about three hours in the house Wednesday morning, loading at least eight brown paper bags into an evidence van. Neeb said the bags contained potential evidence, but not human remains. He would not elaborate, but he said all items recovered were items police expected to see.

"Nothing they got was a surprise," he said.

Godman and their four children were free to return to the home.

Neeb said officers would monitor the home with frequent patrols until further notice for the family's safety, noting that Freeman's alleged crime has unsettled folks in this beach resort that hasn't seen a murder in five years.

Neeb said having an officer at the site was "the prudent thing to do given the high-profile nature of this case."

The investigation will now shift to the fetal remains at state labs.

DiPino said that a specialist also planned to examine Freeman to try to find out where she got bruises on her thighs, abdomen and forearm before being admitted to a hospital Thursday with heavy bleeding.

Police want to know whether the bruises were accidental, self-inflicted or caused by someone else. They have not ruled out the possibility of charging someone else if they have reason to suspect someone caused Freeman's stillbirth last week.

Even if police can find answers to all those questions, legal experts say the job of convicting Freeman or anyone else won't be easy. Maryland's fetal murder law was aimed at criminals who kill pregnant women, not pregnant women who caused their own abortions.

The law contains a specific exemption for abortions.

"It may turn into a war of experts, with the prosecution experts saying the fetus was viable and the defense experts saying the fetus was not viable, or it's impossible to know whether the fetus was viable," said Baltimore attorney Andrew D. Levy, a partner with the firm of Brown, Goldstein & Levy and an adjunct professor at the University of Maryland School of Law.

Todd, the prosecutor, has said little about how he plans to proceed. He told reporters Monday that the state "will have to prove beyond a reasonable doubt that she did something to cause that baby to be stillborn."

Todd did not speculate on whether charges were possible in the three older sets of remains.

Dr. Kim A. Collins, a forensic pathologist at the Medical University of South Carolina, said the odds were long that the earlier fetuses would show signs of trauma.

"It would have to be so severe to transfer all the way through her belly and the uterus. Even in these car wrecks where the woman will die because of trauma, the baby will have no bruises," Collins said.

DiPino said police investigators were undaunted by the legal questions raised by Freeman's unusual case. She said searchers would gather all relevant evidence and await test results and the criminal proceedings before police tackle a final task possibly months away -- figuring out how to give the fetuses a "proper burial."

"We're not going to leave any rock unturned," DiPino said.

Carbon dating

2007-08-03T03:00:00.000-07:00

So, Barbara Feltus, do tell us what attracted you to Lapo Elkann, the heir to the Agnelli and Fiat car fortune? Could it be that he is ginger?

There is a theory among celebrity-watchers – let’s call it the Heat magazine theorem – that we are all attracted to a specific physical type. So when Rod Stewart requires a new wife he casts around for a tall, beautiful leggy blonde and, bingo, he’s content for another decade. Similarly, Boris Becker has a penchant for elegant brunettes, even when he is in a broom cupboard. And now that Feltus, his elegant brunette former wife, has attached herself to Elkann, a Becker doppelgänger, the theory seems incontrovertible.

But what have psychologists got to say about it? Are we all so shallow that we seek out mates purely on the basis of what they look like? Dr Lisa Matthewman, a chartered psychologist at the University of Westminster, says that we do indeed have an ideal type of mate, though happily the characteristics we seek go beyond hair colour and height. “We all have a template of the ideal partner that’s moulded in our early years, mostly before the age of 7, by our immediate care-givers,” she explains. “That’s when we learn about affection and relationships, how men and women relate to each other, and we develop an idea of the kind of person we’re attracted to. This includes physical characteristics and aspects of personality.

“Human beings are habitual, so we don’t like to stray too much from that ideal; if we change partners, we are likely to repeat it. It happens at a subconscious level, but this is why women may seek out attributes they recognise in their father, and men often look for someone who shares some of their mother’s traits. It’s common for a man with a dominant mother to seek a dominant woman as a partner. This happens irrespective of our relationship with our parents.”

Now forgive me, but I doubt that Feltus’s dad is a ginger, though he may very well be energetic and extrovert, as Elkann is said to be, and as Becker appears to be. I put the theory to Dr George Fieldman, a principal lecturer in psychology at Buckingham Chilterns University College, and he says that the psychology of attraction revolves around genetic and environmental factors, and that men and women behave differently. “Men tend to be, in this regard, more superficial,” he says with a sigh. “They go for the physical anatomy that constitutes beauty because they are coded to be attracted to women who are fertile and will pass their [the man’s] genes. That’s not conscious thinking, but it’s why they think like that.”

At this point he goes into a fatherly riff about how this isn’t desirable for society, and how he tells his three sons not to go for babes but for girls who will make good friends. But what, I ask, do women seek in a man? “Women are more eclectic,” he says drily. “And probably more sensible in their choices. They are interested in wealth, a good sense of humour, wealth and wealth.”

This seems a bit harsh, but Fieldman is unrepentant. “There’s evidence for this. Women are certainly attracted to good looks, but there is a biological imperative for their interest in wealth and status because if they mate with someone who has a reasonable standard of living, he will provide a good environment for their offspring to grow up in. The reason that women are attracted to five-carat diamonds is not that they have any particular function of their own, but because if a man can afford such fripperies, he can afford a roof that doesn’t leak.”

There is evidence, he adds, that women who have good relationships with their own fathers tend to seek out men who physically resemble their fathers, but again I am forced to point out that this seems unlikely in Feltus’s case. Can there really be no explanation for her evident affection for pale ginger men other than their ability to pay the bills? After all, Feltus spent eight years with Becker – she must have liked him.

Happily, at this point Fieldman feels suddenly inspired. “If you’ve fallen in love with somebody and it hasn’t worked out, there may be some sort of nonconscious attempt to replicate the situation and to get it right this time,” he suggests. “You remember how happy you were with someone, you want to rewind the tapes and have another go, so you may seek out someone with the same characteristics and hope that this time it works.”

Thank you, Dr Fieldman, for fleshing out the the Heattheorem. It may not be in the psychological literature, but it makes excellent sense.

Rod okay with Tommy Lee dating daughter

2007-08-03T02:56:00.000-07:00

Rod Stewart has given permission for Tommy Lee to date his daughter Kimberly.

The Maggie May singer has given the 44-year-old Motley Crue drummer the go-ahead after being impressed by the rocker's attempts to woo 27-year-old Kimberly.

Rod met Tommy - who has two children, Brandon and Dylan, with ex-wife Pamela Anderson - and Kimberly for lunch on Wednesday and was in hysterics when he learned Tommy had hired a helicopter to take his pride and joy on a date.

According to Britain's Daily Mirror newspaper, the 62-year-old singer said: "I've tried some manoeuvres in my time to pursue a woman, but I've got to admit this is a pretty strong move.

"Attempting to land a helicopter in my garden just to impress my daughter is quite something!" Despite Tommy's romantic gesture, he was unable to carry out the plan.

He had wanted to pick Kimberly up from Rod's Los Angeles mansion and take her to a concert in San Diego.

However, Tommy needed permission from Rod to land in the grounds and he wasn't there to give it. So after hovering overhead, Tommy flew away.

A source said: "Kimberly was so touched that he had made such an effort that she trekked to another airport in Los Angeles where Tommy was allowed to land. They flew to the concert from there."

Tommy - who has been as much as a lothario as Rod - and Kimberly were first linked earlier this month after the blonde beauty was spotted running out of a restaurant launch party after the rocker had been refused entry.

A source said: "They threw their arms around each other and she cried, Baby, baby, before they kissed passionately."

Dating Non-Christians Unacceptable According to ChristiaNet.com Poll

2007-08-03T02:55:00.001-07:00

MEDIA ADVISORY, July 31 /Christian Newswire/ -- ChristiaNet.com, the world's largest Christian portal with twelve million monthly page loads, conducted a new poll by asking the question, "Should a Christian ever date a non-Christian?" The majority of participants believed that Christians should not be "unequally yoked" with non-Christians. Bill Cooper, President of ChristiaNet, said, "Dating is meant to lead to marriage; therefore Christians shouldn't be dating non-believers."

Out of 459 respondents, 64% answered "No" to the poll question. Most that provided comments quoted from 2nd Corinthians in the Bible, "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers:" Understanding the importance God places on personal relationships many voters made comments like "They have nothing in common such as morals and values" or "Christians should never date someone they would not be willing to marry." Even though Christians are called to spread the Gospel, many realized trying to witness through dating is wrong. One concerned Believer said, "The influence of the world is strong, your beliefs will be compromised."

Twenty-four percent of the readers felt that Christians dating non-Christians is acceptable. Contrary to those who believed this form of dating was wrong, many think of dating as a viable way to witness, with responses like "This would be an ideal way to win someone over to the Lord" and "As long as the date consists of Church activities." Others in this group saw dating and marriage as two completely different acts. Whereas, dating a non-Believer was okay, but to marry a non-Believer would be wrong.

The remaining twelve percent selected "Unsure". Comments from this group discouraged the dating of non-Christians such as "We shouldn't be unequally yoked" or "It's not a good idea." Some saw dating as an opportunity for witnessing, while others felt this form of evangelism was not productive. As a reader stated, "Rarely do Christians convert non-Christians while dating." Most polled agree that marriage to a non-Christian violates God's Word. It seems reasonable that if dating can lead to marriage then the same rules should apply. As a forward thinking Believer stated, "This is a recipe for disaster, especially if the relationship advances to marriage."

To educate Christians about dating, ChristiaNet has just released a series of Free Marriage Tracts. Using the latest interactive ecard technology, ChristiaNet has made it simple to share these funny yet informative ecards with friends and family.

Ex-Wolverine dating Hilary Duff?

2007-08-03T02:53:00.000-07:00

For the first time in a while, there's a big story on the hockey/Hollywood beat: Former Wolverine Mike Comrie might be dating teen queen Hilary Duff.

The two -- let's call them Milary -- were photographed having dinner Wednesday in California, then they drove off in Comrie's car. And sources told celeb blog TMZ.com that "the twosome have been hot and heavy since a wet weekend of jetskiing in Idaho."

But while Duff, a 19-year-old singer and actress, admitted to the Edmonton Journal that she has gone out with the 26-year-old New York Islander a couple of times this month, they're totally not going steady.

"It's like, he's great, he's really nice, but we're not, like, boyfriend and girlfriend," she said. "I was actually laughing with my friends, because I don't know anything about hockey. Maybe I'm going to have to learn."

Just watch a few games on TV, Hil. If you can find Versus.

Canseco calls him A-Roid?

Jose Canseco, the former big-league slugger who wrote a 2005 book about steroid use by Mark McGwire, Juan Gonzalez and Pudge Rodriguez, says he has another page-turner due this fall -- and hinted that it takes aim at Yankees star Alex Rodriguez.

According to the New York Daily News, he told Boston's WEEI Radio on Friday that he had "other stuff" on A-Rod. When asked directly if Rodriguez had used steroids, Canseco replied: "Wait and see."

The suspense builds ...

Clinton administration

One of the best things about the start of NFL training camp is that we get more quotes from Redskins tailback Clinton Portis. This is how he described his relationship with offensive coordinator Al Saunders to the Washington Post:

"If he says, 'Clinton I need you to run through that brick wall,' and that brick wall, it's hard to run through a brick wall, I've got to find a way to get as close as I can and dive over the top of this brick wall and tell him, '(Expletive), I made it over.' You know? 'I did it. I didn't do it the way you asked me to do it, but I got there.' "

Quick hits

• Devils goalie Martin Brodeur will serve in Greg Biffle's pit crew at this weekend's NASCAR Busch Montreal 200. Brodeur will help direct Biffle's car to the pit box but won't go over the wall.

• The latest fashion craze in Alabama is a T-shirt reading, "Member of Sabanation since 2007."

• In honor of Ty Cobb's spikes-up sliding, the West Michigan Whitecaps will give away Cobb bobblefoot dolls to the first 1,000 fans at Tuesday's game against Peoria.

Overheard

• Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, 30 this week: "I still feel like I'm 22. I don't know if that's good or bad."

• Braves reliever Wil Ledezma, who is 0-2 with a 7.71 ERA and has gotten stuck in Venezuela since being traded by the Tigers: "It's been a tough month. This month is the worst I've had in all my career."

• Cyclist Michael Rasmussen, who was kicked out of the Tour de France while leading: "I will never get over it. I believe it equals getting a Picasso painting stolen. I was working on the greatest piece I could achieve, and it was taken away from me."

• American Tour rider Chris Horner, on the race's doping scandals: "I think people got what they really wanted -- entertainment."

‘Dating Kate Moss Was Like The Vietnam War’

2007-08-03T02:52:00.000-07:00

Pete Doherty has been talking openly about his relationship with Kate Moss.

This time the junkie rocker is claiming that he was the one who left the model, not the other way round.

Speaking to the Sun, the Babyshambles singer said their volatile relationship "became like the Vietnam war".

He added: “I left her. Why would I beg to have her back? Why would she come back? She hasn’t spoken to me.”

Last night, reports claimed that Moss went ballistic after watching footage of him flirting with groupies, and even sharing a bottle of red wine with one female fan.

Pete said: “I didn’t cheat on her. When we talked about what would happen if she caught me cheating, I’d say ‘I bet you’d chop my bits off’. But she’d say ‘No, I’d never speak to you again’ as she knows that would hurt me. That’s what she’s done.”

So, did Kate leave Pete? Or did Pete leave Kate? The confusion is too much!

Prince dating identical Caribbean twins

2007-08-03T02:51:00.000-07:00

Washington, Aug. 1 (ANI): Eccentric singer Prince is reportedly going around with two identical, Caribbean twins who join him as backing vocalists on his latest tour, which includes performances at the O2 arena.

The sisters have refused to reveal their identity, and are referred to as ‘Twinz’.

They are also keeping mum on whether their affair with the ‘Purple Rain’ star will continue after the series of London shows is over.

"Prince is a huge fan of ours. He is someone who likes to have beautiful women around him," said the exotic pair.

"He is a cool cat, always dressed to impress. And he keeps us laughing all the time," the sisters added.

Prince, who is known as a name-changing pop star, has been married twice before. He has also been linked to a string of stunners, including Carmen Electra, in the past.

The star will play 21 shows at the former Millennium Dome in all.

Relationship expert finds herself dating again

2007-08-03T02:50:00.000-07:00

There is nothing quite as disconcerting as having to follow your own advice. After 30 years of answering people's questions about their emotional, sexual and romantic lives, I found myself in the somewhat ironic situation of having to pose, and answer, some of these same questions for myself.

At first, like most people who have just gotten a divorce, I wanted to stay home, do some soul searching, figure out what went wrong and what part I had in it.

But soon there is that familiar itch: the desire for intimacy, connection, sex and, in my case, adventure. Love would be nice, too, but honestly, when you have just disconnected from a 23-year marriage, sex and companionship seem a lot less complicated than love and commitment do, and therefore a lot more imaginable.

As a relationship expert, finding that connection should have been a piece of cake, right?

Wrong. As every doctor knows, it's different when you're the patient. I had many of the qualms of re-entry that everyone does. So I had to embark on a fix-up campaign to get myself date-ready — and think about what I actually wanted and who I was looking for.

One thing I knew: I was starting over again at 55.

I started out by creating a new philosophy about sex and love. I decided that the only way I would figure out who and what I wanted was by meeting a wide range of men — cowboys, poets, fishermen, chefs, CEOs, or whoever else crossed my path. The "how" of it was pretty easy — I knew the online dating scene as the relationship expert for Perfectmatch.com — now I just had to go explore dating online myself.

That the dating expert would be looking for a date was a little embarrassing, so I didn't put my picture on the site. Instead, I looked at men's profiles, and if they were intriguing, I'd invite them to look at a description of me. If they liked that, I promised to send a picture.

Thus started a chain of "coffee dates" that online daters know only too well. These short encounters exist for a reason; a quick in, then out if the guy's not OK. I learned this the hard way when a guy who said he had always admired me wanted to take me out to a really nice dinner. I relented when he suggested Canlis, one of my favorite places in Seattle.

Once we got there, however, I might as well have gone alone. He talked so fast and so much that all I could do was sit there and time him, thinking maybe I was witnessing some kind of world's record for self-absorption. At 45 minutes, he looked up, a little dazed with his own chatter and said, "Am I talking too much?" I said, "Yes, actually you are."

He looked abashed and then, I kid you not, talked on for another 20 minutes. I had time to listen, chew my food very carefully, and learn not to allow more than a half-hour for a first meeting.

There were other colorful characters, some so unusual that I learned to think of dating as anthropological fieldwork. I decided each person would have something to teach me, no matter how dreadful a match we might be for each other.

My favorite oddity was a man who was handsome, smart, nice and accomplished. He seemed like a perfectly fine bet for a relationship. There was only one problem: he could not pass a beast without making that animal's noises. We decided to go hiking in the Methow Valley and stay over at Sun Mountain Lodge. But the ride there killed the possibility of anything more physical than climbing up a few hills. If we saw a horse, he neighed, a dog, he produced a bark, a cat — well, you know. I was afraid to order a steak.

Of course not all of these dates produced a humorous or strange story. Some produced all kinds of satisfaction: intellectual, emotional and sexual.

Dating, though difficult and disappointing when love didn't last, was clearly possible and often fabulous, no matter that my 20s and 30s were distant memories. I have come to believe that love is possible at any age, that romance and passion are no less intense at middle or old age than they were when we were barely out of our teens, and that all of this can be ours if we put ourselves out there, learn how to handle loss or rejection, and have the resilience to pick ourselves up and start the process all over again.

This is the very cycle that many women and men just can't bear to face, but I have to say, the happy moments justify having to deal with the sad ones. Love is life-giving, passion helps sustain our youthfulness, and relationships help us to grow and develop heart and character. All of that is just too good to miss.

I met the man I am dating now online. Honestly I don't remember why I picked him out except that he was attractive, wrote well and sounded like a sincere, bright, athletic, nice person. I contacted him and said I was interested. He replied that he thought he knew who I was, and he was a little put off about meeting another ambitious, busy, Type-A woman. He had gone that route before and wasn't sure it was a good fit.

I wrote him back that yes, he had guessed who I was and what I was like. But I thought we should meet anyway. I mentioned the scene in "Notting Hill" where Julia Roberts has to convince Hugh Grant that her world isn't all she is. She says something like, "I'm just a girl, standing in front of a boy... ."

He replied, "OK, you got me with that one." We met for coffee. He was even more handsome in person than in his picture, and a genuinely nice and witty man. This was last autumn, and we have been dating ever since.

The Internet is your friend

The Internet is one of the most efficient and safe ways to find romance. I still hear women and men voicing fears of who's on there, but believe me, it's a godsend to older people who aren't meeting loads of eligible partners.

You get a lot more information about someone you've met in cyberspace than you do in other kinds of one-time contact. There are bad dates everywhere, but the Internet has no more than other parts of the dating world do — and probably less.

Writing a profile

Put out your best stuff. Don't lie, but you can omit your flaws. Everyone has them and they don't need to be in your first sentence. Leave out anything but a brief mention of children — you are looking for a partner, not a father or mother. If they are partner material, then you can see if they will fit into your family or vice versa.

Use a good picture, but make sure it's yours and wasn't taken for your high school graduation. Avoid anyone who has a blurry picture, sunglasses or won't show you a picture on request.

Talking on the phone

Don't wait too long before making this relationship aural. If you like each other online, then relatively quickly transfer it to the phone. (Use a non-traceable number just in case you do meet Mr./Ms. Wrong and don't want them to know your phone number.)

If you let the e-mail relationship go on too long, you may be caught in a fantasy perception of this person that gets you way too attached before you have a better sense of who she or he really is. Hearing their voice and talking is the first test of finding out who they really are.

Meeting someone

Likewise, once you've talked, arrange to meet fairly soon. I've known people who were just about saying "I love you" because of the intimacy and beauty of what they wrote to each other — until they met in person and one of them realized there was no chemistry.

Use the half-hour meeting rule (you can always extend it). If it's really a great match, there will be a second date.

Remember to listen and ask questions — both of you are being interviewed — each of you should know more about the other than when you started. Do not complain even if your day was a horror and your kids robbed a bank.

Don't dump on your ex even though you are sorely tempted. Everyone will always be thinking, "... and what would he/she be saying about me?" Try to see if there is any reason you two should know each other that is not readily apparent — i.e., explore hobbies, values, lifestyle, talents, passions.

Don't give up

I don't care if the first 15 dates are duds. There is someone out there for you.

Match.com offers Mobile Online Dating Service

2007-08-03T02:43:00.000-07:00

Online dating just got cozier and comfortable as Match.com came up with another mobile phone based service. According to a report in Reuters, online dating service Match.com is launching a new application for cell phones, allowing subscribers to be in touch with their love interests on the go.

If you are a match.com subscriber, chances are, you would have come across someone special. If you hate to talk to your special one only via email and if you want to keep in touch with him/her all the time, this service will help you to do just that. As the market with flooded with devices that allow users to check their emails from their mobile, this service should be fairly simple to use.

When you get an email from someone interested in you, this server sends an SMS to your mobile device. It also lets you to search for your partner from your mobile phones. If a subscriber wants to answer the suitor from his/her mobile phone, he/she just needs to pick up their phone and send a message. This extra service costs $5 per month and will be first introduced in United States, UK and Canadian markets before spreading to other markets, the company stated.

Match.com reportedly has a good track record when it comes to mobile based services. According to Enraght-Moony, an earlier version of Match.com for mobile phones was used by nearly half a million subscribers. Match.com has a database of nearly 15 million users and the new service will allow them to tap into that database on the go.

And Match.com has the market trend going for it too. According to data from tracking firm M:Metrics, about 3.6 million U.S. cell phones subscribers used a mobile dating service in May this year. The company can also take heart from the forecasts from Frost & Sullivan, which predicts that revenue from mobile dating services will grow to $215 million by 2009.

Affiliate Marketing; What's In It For You - Or, How To Make Money Selling Other People's Stuff.

2007-08-03T02:37:00.000-07:00

What is Affiliate Marketing? Let me put it this way. How many times have you told a friend or relative about a product or service that you like that resulted in them purchasing that product or service? Now imagine doing the same thing on the Internet, but on a much larger scale. Now imagine that that the companies you refer people to pay you a commission for your referrals. That's how affiliate marketing works.
The perks of starting an affiliate marketing business include:

Typically no cost to join most affiate programs.

The ability to work from home, be your own boss and set your own hours.

Startup costs are usually low. A fraction of what traditional business can be.

You don't have to worry about customer service, inventory, shipping or receiving.

It's easy to get started in affiliate marketing. There are many online programs that assist you and allow you to get started immediately.

You can work full time or part time.

You would be surprised how much affiliate marketing it going on out there. I know I was. It's all around us. For example, when I drive out of my housing development, there are little signs beside the road advertising a dating website. I see these signs every day, but I never realized they were put there by an affiliate marketer marketing for a dating site. The next time you are shopping at your favorite online store, try scrolling down to the very bottom on their homepage. You will find that many of them have a little link at the bottom of their page labeled "affiliate". Look at the Amazon.com and Dell Computers sites for examples. These companies are looking for people to advertise their products. How many times have you purchased something on the Internet and ended up making your purchase through Clickbank? Clickbank is an affiliate program network. They describe themselves as "...the Internet's largest digital marketplace". They are basically the middle men between affiliates and the real product sellers. If you have an ebook you want to sell, you might put it on Clickbank. When someone purchases your ebook, the affiliate and Clickbank both get a percentage of the sale.

The thing I like most about affiliate marketing, is that there really is very little maintenance required. Once you set up your website and affiliate advertisements, your home business can be on autopilot.

It's not uncommon for affiliates to market for multiple companies, creating multiple streams of income. Although focusing on one particular type of product is typically recommended. For example, you might have a website that promotes Internet dating sites or work at home opportunities.

There is a lot of opportunity out there for those who want it. It does take some effort during your startup months, but if you stick with it, you can expect to earn extra income, stay at home with your kids or replace your existing income working fewer hours. If you are going to venture into affiliate marketing, you should do plenty of research. There are a lot of people who try affiliate marketing, don't stick with it and fail, but there are also those who are persistent and make a lot of money doing it. The best advice I can give is, start slowly, do your research, test to see what works and stick with it!

Eileen Childs is a mother of two living in Virginia. She had twenty years experience working in a corporate environment when she decided to start a work at home business. http://www.sfidboard.com/showthread.php?t=47436

How To Personalize Your Unique Anniversary Gift

2007-08-03T02:36:00.001-07:00

Whether you have been dating for one year or married for 50 years, an anniversary gift is the perfect way to show your love and appreciation. When thinking about the perfect anniversary gift, it is important to incorporate something special that has meaning for both you and your partner. While this will take a slight bit of (gasp!) effort on your part, it will certainly be appreciated by your sweetheart. In this article, we?ll show you how to personalize your unique anniversary gift to leave a lasting impression.
Let?s start with a fairly new relationship. Say that you have been dating for one year, and you want to show your honey that they mean a lot to you. What steps should you take? Well, first and foremost, you should have a pretty good idea of what makes your partner tick. By incorporating their favorite sports team, song, movie, or quote into any gift, you will be sure to impress. At the same time, it is important not to go overboard in this instance. The two of you are still basically in the beginning stages of building a relationship, so you should probably avoid anything too extravagant. What is the perfect balance for this situation?

In the case of a one year dating anniversary, it is probably best to lean towards thoughtful gifts. A perfect example is to make a scrapbook or collage complete with the memories that have made the past year so special. By including pictures, ticket stubs, and other special milestones (important dates, songs, quotes, etc.), you will be sure to deliver a heartfelt and personalized anniversary gift that will definitely be appreciated. That is not to say you also can?t buy a little something extra as well, but just know that you can never go wrong with a gift that displays thought.

Now let?s turn our focus towards a longer relationship. Let?s say that you have been married for 20, 30, 40, or even 50 years, and you want to show your significant other that they still mean the world to you. How can you accomplish this? Well, one suggestion is to design an anniversary ring that bears some type of special meaning. By implementing certain features into the ring that have some sort of significance, you can show your partner just how special they really are.

Another idea for personalizing an anniversary gift in longer marriages is to book a trip back to your original honeymoon spot. By going back to the same location, hotel, restaurants, etc. you will give your spouse a truly unforgettable experience, while keeping the passion of marriage burning brightly.

If these two suggestions don?t work into your budget, don?t fret. Any thoughtful gift will serve the purpose, as long as it represents something that has great meaning in your relationship. The main thing to remember, regardless of how many years you are celebrating, is to use both your mind and your heart when choosing a gift. The old saying ?it?s the thought that counts? really does hold true when personalizing a unique anniversary gift.

Cameron Diaz and Jude Law dating?

2007-08-03T02:34:00.002-07:00

'The Holiday' co-stars Cameron Diaz and Jude Law have reportedly struck up a romantic relationship recently.

According to the News of the World, Law is jetting out to the US this week to spend some quality time with Diaz.

A source told the newspaper: "Jude plans to take her on a series of dinner dates this week and just spend some time hanging out."

"The key to their relationship has always been the fun, so that's what they're hoping for this week."

"Cameron and Jude really bonded while working together but now that friendship has turned into a romance."

Diaz previously said about Law: "He's charismatic, fun, open and charming. It's very easy to fall in love with him."

Jude Law denies dating Cameron Diaz

2007-08-03T02:34:00.001-07:00

Atlanta, GA 7/31/2007 4:48 PM GMT (FINDITT)
Jude Law insists that he and Cameron Diaz are “just friends.” The pair was reported to be dating after Law was said to be flying to the United States to be with the actress. Law and Diaz allegedly fell for each other on the set of their movie ‘The Holiday’ in 2006.

A source claimed that they “really bonded” on the set and Law flew to America to “just spend some time and hang out.” Law denies the reports, and says although he is in Los Angeles; he is only there to shoot his new movie, “Repossession Mambo,” and won’t be seeing Diaz at all.

“He hasn’t seen her for months,” says Law’s spokesperson. “They’re friends but that’s it.”

New Dating Website Where Travelers and Locals Connect

2007-08-03T02:01:00.000-07:00

aWOWtrip announced today the launch of its new dating website that lets travelers and locals from all over the world connect and bring a whole new level of pleasure to trips (or how they call it, bring out the WOW in their trips).

(Bluehost) July 31, 2007 -- aWOWtrip announced today the launch of its new dating website that lets travelers and locals from all over the world connect and bring a whole new level of pleasure to trips -- or how they call it, bring out the WOW in their trips.

These days, millions of people travel everyday, for business or leisure. But travel can be lonely at times. aWOWtrip lets resourceful travelers and open-minded locals hook up and have amazing connections.

Be it a lasting friendship, a one time dinner or concert date, a discreet encounter or simply some poker night buddies, you name it! Once you choose the game, aWOWtrip gives you the players. For travelers, having personal introduction to the local life is a dream come true. For locals, meeting people from another city prevents jealousy and drama, and provides opportunities to get ideas and products from other places.

Members choose the activities and type of interactions they want. Travelers can also indicate their travel plans and locals can let travelers know if they wish a token of appreciation for their company and time.

"I travel for my business all the time. Thanks to aWOWtrip, my business trips are no longer lonely or stressful! I've met great people from all over. They brought me around, I brought them some French wine and we had a great time! I am still in touch with a few of them!" says a 32-year old traveler from Paris.

aWOWtrip is adding functionality every day for its members. It currently offers messaging service, chat rooms, events scheduling and profile rating. Registered users can also share their travel plans or availability, create their travel or local blogs, participate in forums, rate others and view all scheduled events.

To celebrate its new launch, aWOWtrip is offering a free 6-month membership to all new registered members, with a valid profile and photo.

Vince Vaughn Dating Universal PicturesMovie NewsJuly 31, 2007

2007-08-03T02:00:00.000-07:00

It turns out that Vince Vaughn has got the hots for Universal Pictures; or is it the other way around? Either way, Vaughn and Universal have signed a two-year, first-look producing deal that will land Vaughn a minimum of three starring vehicles.

Vince Vaughn Teams with Universal
Vaughn has set in development Male Doula, a high-concept comedy based on his idea, to be scripted by Dana Fox.

Though I hated The Break-Up, Vince Vaughn will partner with its producer, Scott Stuber, with two other projects.

One is an untitled comedy Jon Favreau is scripting about couples that attend a retreat to reinvigorate their marriages. The other is Realtors, a satire about the cutthroat chase for commissions by rival realtors in the residential housing market. Okay, okay, watching Vaughn compete to sell property does have a lot of promise.

The deal between Wild West Pictures Show Prods. and Universal gives Vaughn some room to acquire pitches and spec scripts with a discretionary fund.

Vaughn received his first producing credit with Favreau on their Swingers follow-up Made.
"We came away feeling that he was one of the absolute smartest guys in the business, who attended to every part of the process with such focus and has a real touch for what is fresh and interesting for the culture," Universal Pictures chairman Marc Shmuger told Daily Variety. "We think Vince will find a long and comfortable place for himself here."

"I'm looking forward to working again with Marc, David Linde, Donna Langley and their talented teams," Vaughn said in a statement. "I had a great experience on The Break-Up, and the marketing team, led by Adam Fogelson, did a fantastic job with the film."

Double Dating

2007-08-03T01:58:00.000-07:00

Tire companies like to use terms like “on-road manners” and “off-road capabilities” when discussing cross-segment tires. These rather difficult-to-quantify characteristics are easier to explain than demonstrate. It’s tough to create the physical experience that exactly emulates “what we’re talking about.”

Part of the demonstration issue is location – finding a place that provides the type of driving the product is intended to match.

The Barber Motorsports Park near Birmingham, Ala., gave Michelin North America (MNA) a good location for some 50 members of the U.S. and Canadian auto and tire media to try out its new Michelin Primacy MXV4 touring line and the Michelin LTX A/T2 light truck/SUV radial.

Built by Birmingham real estate multi-millionaire George Barber, the facility is also home to the Porsche Driving Experience and the 144,000-square foot, five-level Barber Vintage Motorsports Museum, home to the world’s largest private collection of motorcycles – some 1,000 bikes dating back to 1904.

Why is that important? Well, the park also has acres and acres of open pavement, including a 2.4-mile racetrack and a series of off-road trails cut through the thick, hilly Alabama woods, making it a convenient place to demonstrate two different tires.

Before taking the tire out on a wet autocross course and wet braking exercise, Nick Nalepa, MNA’s touring category product manager, outlined the Primacy MXV4’s market position and features. The focus of the tire is the H- and V-rated touring tire segment, and the Primacy MXV4, with a 60,000-mile treadwear warranty, will replace the Energy MXV4, Nalepa said.

Among the tire’s features is Michelin’s “Advanced MaxTouch Construction technology,” which it claims delivers a larger, more even footprint, especially in cornering. The tread design is computer optimized for traction, water dispersal and reduced road noise and vibration, he said. “Active sipes” enhance both wet weather and winter traction, he noted.

Combined, the features result in a tire that delivers comfort, handling and extended wear, Nalepa noted.

The Primacy MXV4 is now available in 32 sizes, covering 15- to 18-inch wheel diameters.

The media corps also ran a set of LTX A/T2-shod Ford F-150 XLs along a series of dirt and rock obstacles and through the woods along trails that were barely wide enough for Porsche Cayennes, let alone the extra-long trucks.

Before hitting the woods, John Soule, MNA light truck category manager, ran down the specs and features on the new tire. Designed to go head to head with the Goodyear Wrangler SA and Bridgestone Dueler AT Revo, the Michelin TX A/T2 was developed to provide a balance of “on-road manners” and “off-road capabilities,” he said.

With 15 P-metric and 17 LT-metric sizes – covering 16- to 18-inch wheel diameters – the LTX A/T2 covers the gamut, from work truck to luxury SUV, Soule said. The 500 AB UTQG-rated tire is now available in the U.S.; Canadian dealers can get the tire in August.

Soule said the tire features aggressive tread blocks that deliver multiple biting edges for soft surface traction, while Michelin’s “Comfort Control technology” is incorporated for reduced on-road noise and vibration. Three steel belts aid durability, and Michelin’s Advanced MaxTouch Construction helps aid treadlife, he noted.

Dating a Man You Met Online

2007-08-03T01:28:00.000-07:00

Dear Thomas,
Two weeks ago I met a 55-year-old, highly successful senior executive and 8-years divorced man on a reputable online dating service. He is my second romantic interest I met online and the first one I will actually meet in person. I am a 51-year-old that looks 37, never-married, single woman who has not dated since my late boyfriend passed away 3 years ago. I am a little cynical about most men.

My new man has given me his contact information but not where he works, and he wants to come visit me. He might be protective of his privacy since he is a high-ranking executive, or there may be another reason.

How do I ensure my personal safety with a man I never met before? How do I ease my nervousness so I do not talk excessively so I can listen and hear? I want him to know I am not there for casual sex--how do I make all of these points and still keep his interest?
--Jennifer

Dear Jennifer,
My main concern about your first date with a man you met online is your physical safety, should you accept his suggestion of a visit/date. I strongly recommend that you meet him first in a public place, perhaps bringing a friend of yours with you. At the very least, tell a good friend when and where you are meeting. You can find good and extensive advice about safe online dating in many places on the Internet—start with this Beliefnet piece.

For your emotional safety, you might consider that an online meeting doesn't have to be followed by instant intimacy or a sexual relationship. You could take advantage of email as a good way to converse for a while. Even then, of course, you have to be careful: the person may not be telling the truth. You could turn your cynicism, not a very positive emotion, into intelligent caution.

You're clear that you don't want casual sex. If you continue to exchange emails, you can let him know how you feel about it. You can be clear and brief and then go on to other things. If you're worried about the sexual part and don't say anything, it will be the elephant on the screen and may interfere. A man worth knowing shouldn't be put off by a brief, clearly stated expression of how you feel about sex.

You say you don't want to put him off. That sentiment puts you in the down position, trying to please and not offend. It would be so much better to be equals from the start. Be yourself and let him make his choice of where he wants to go from here. Don’t be desperate. There are a lot of good men out there.

Good relationships can come from online dating. On one hand, online dating has pitfalls, chiefly the opportunity to hide and not show your true self. The beauty of online conversation, on the other hand, is that you can learn much about each other before you meet. You can pick up a very old and useful tradition of writing letters as a movement toward intimacy. Take advantage of this benefit, and be strong, assertive, and clear.

Your nervousness probably comes from not being confident about your attractiveness as a person. You're worried about the impression you make. The solution is not to hide your thoughts and feelings, but to present them with confidence. If this man is someone worth pursuing, he will be further attracted to you because of your strength as a person. Think about what you want from a relationship, and then don't back down.
--Thomas

Why Date Someone You Wouldnt Have As Your Friend?

2007-08-03T01:27:00.000-07:00

Sometimes in dating we so often settle for people that we would not normally have as friends? Why is that? Does the desire to be in a relationship outweigh our standards in love that we will take on a relationship with someone that isn't good for us? I think that we often let loneliness overshadow our standards that we set. We need to stick to our desires and not engage ourselves into relationships that we wouldn't ordinarily engage in.

So often we find people that are almost right in dating, but they tend to fall short. They may fall short on honestly, integrity, or their priorities that we have set for ourselves. Yet, that desire to engage in the relationship short circuits the judgments that we normally have set in place. We tend to be picky when it comes to selecting close friends, and we have levels of friendships with different people, but unfortunately with romantic relationships those levels do not seem to be able to be followed.

Our romantic relationships are somewhat like a light switch, either fully on or fully off. Often we do not use the process of dating to be a get to know you period, but rather we engage in closer romantic relationships too quickly. Sometimes we have already become very involved with someone before we realize they do not have the qualities that we desire the most.

What happens when we realize we are seriously involved with someone that we aren't in alignment with in things that are important to us? We tend to find ourselves in relationships that are doomed to fail at one time or another. Eventually the characteristics that irritate us now, will be like a great divide later in the relationship. Its unfortunate but these things will come back to haunt the relationship at some time and point in the future.

Perhaps the better approach would be to take things slow and easy when first starting a relationship with a new person. We need to also take stock of what our true desires are in that other person before we engage in an intimate relationship, and constantly judge that person against what our goals and values are before we become seriously involved. Knowing what we what in a relationship before engaging in a relationship will aide us in selecting the right person before we are at the bridal registry, and while we can safely back out of a potential relationship.

A Date With A Stranger

2007-08-03T01:26:00.000-07:00

Well, I have decided to move forward once again. I have had two relationships that I thought were it, believed I got all the signs, thought I had found my soulmate. Just to be slapped back into reality once again. I am so tired of the whole dating game. I am now 31 yrs old. I really miss having a family life. I have my son, but I am yearning for so much more. I guess my whole outlook on life was love. That was the most important thing to me. I have since decided that maybe I am putting way to much emphasis on finding the right one and not putting enough effort into meeting new people as friends and possibly potentials. I was just never a dating girl I guess.

My friends say, 'there is no reason for you to always look at every situation and person as a love interest'. Am I wrong for looking at it that way? I am definitely not the "go out and have fun girl". Meaning I am not a one- night- stand type of person. I have only had one in my lifetime and I am proud of that fact that it was only one. I wouldn't have had that if I would've known that was what it was. It seems I have been smart enough or just lucky enough to not have that in my life. No matter what anyone says I don't honestly believe that any self- respecting lady has one- night- stands but hey that is my opinion. I guess you can call me old -fashioned. I want the fairy tale and I have thought, twice now, that I had found it. The first time with my now ex husband and the second time with my now definitely ex boyfriend.

I am so furious, not with men but I, myself, I guess. I always put myself, or now put myself in a 100% out there and involved in my relationships. Maybe because I am not the dating type, maybe because I don't want to be played myself. Either way, I don't play games and a lot of people don't, but then some do. I know I am young at 31, but when you put love as a top priority it gets so old when it isn't reciprocated. I will explain me if I haven't done that enough already.

I am 31 yrs old. I am a single, mother of my son, Dakota, whom is 7 yrs old. I am a student, majoring in Criminal Justice. I am a stay at home mom other than school. I do the best I can. I visit with friends often and they visit me. My friends are my family, I love them dearly. I have family and I am close with some, and very close with others in my family. I am very independent, meaning I don't think I need a man, but I sure would like to spend the rest of my life with one. If that is in the cards. I do not play games. I detest them and people who do play them. I don't need to be with a man 24-7. I like having my free time, and I like doing things with my son that involves us (me and Bub), until I meet the right person that is how it will remain. I don't get my son involved in my relationships. My friends and I spend a great deal of time talking and hanging out together, on a daily basis pretty much.

I am not one to bug a man, maybe that is it. Maybe the men I meet just need someone who is well, needy, and that isn't me. I don't call everyday, I don't want to see you everyday if we just met, I want you to accept my son first and foremost but when I feel it is right, You can meet him when I am sure, I want a man to accept my friends and my family. Is that really to much to ask? Treat me with respect and consideration, actually want to be involved and in a relationship with similar goals in mind regarding that, as in a commitment. Is that what we are working towards? I don't want to be committed right off the bat though. I don't think I have asked for a whole lot. I have went out of my comfort zone, giving people the benefit of the doubt to quickly realize I was right in thinking it was a mistake to begin with. My fault, but it still stings. I just want to be happy. I am happy, but I want to be able to be involved and be happy. I want my best friend and soulmate. Is he out there, is he looking?

I thought for sure with Jon it would be different but I have no idea why he does what he does and I can see finally, it isn't going to change and it isn't me, he just doesn't get it, the whole love thing, but it is on him, and I am not resentful anymore. I want all my exes to be happy, I truly do. I did meet someone and I have known him for awhile. But you know what I am scared to death because I honestly don't know how to date without looking at a person as a possible love interest, if you know how please tell me. I mean it seems to go against my nature.

The big thing is I don't think it is going to be anything but someone to talk to and have fun with because he is only 21. OMG, what am I getting myself into. what made me decide to go out with him, is this, he would always stare at me, now I mean stare, as in walk away turning around backwards to look, when he would come over near me he would look me dead in the eye and to be quite frank I haven't had anyone do that for a long time. He is beside himself when we talk for some reason. He always touches his face and rubs his hands through his hair, that nervous reaction you get, ya know what I mean. He will stare me in the eyes when he is talking or walking by, I get a little rush I have to admit. The fact that I don't think it will amount to anything because he is so young kind -of makes it a little more interesting.

My date with the "baby" as I will call him, not in a bad way in a "precious name' way. I have a habit of nicknaming my exs. I have no idea why. I just do, some aren't that precious either, lol. I like this young guy's charisma, I like that he isn't intimidated by me. I can tell that by his, look me in the eye, demeanor yet I feel a sense of over -whelming attraction, could be a good thing or bad. All I know is I need a break from being serious, now I am not meaning I am going to sleep with him on our date but I am going to look, or at least try to, look at him differently and I will let you know how it goes. He made me promise to keep the date regardless, and I agreed, so we will see what happens, wish me luck and to you all going out on your first date with someone new, good luck and God bless ya.

60 SECONDS: Eric McCormack

2007-08-03T01:25:00.000-07:00

Canadian actor Eric McCormack is best known for playing Will in gay sitcom Will & Grace, which surprisingly managed to last eight series. Don't be fooled, though. Eric isn't gay in real life – he's married with a child. He's also become a producer and his first show, Lovespring International, an improvised sitcom set in the hilarious world of a dating agency, starts on Sky One on Sunday.

What has been your own worst dating experience?
I was 18 in high school. I was dating a slightly older girl who seemed so smart and political. She wanted to go to a political rally at the school and a Canadian politician called Joe Clark was talking. I thought that sounded really intellectual. We showed up and she immediately began heckling, really loudly. She started shouting: ‘F*** you, Clark’. When that was finished, she said: ‘Come on, let’s go smoke dope.’We got to her parents’ house, where her father kept a huge garbage bag in the garage filled with weed. That was the end of that. I don’t know where she is now… probably prison.

Is Lovespring International all improvised?
It is. The scenarios are written but all the dialogue is improvised by the actors. We did 13 episodes. I’m a guest star in one and so is Sean Hayes [Jack in Will & Grace].

Was it a relief to finish Will & Grace?
It wasn’t a relief – I just loved doing it. It was our decision to finish it. We loved it but knew that it had to end. A ninth series might have diminished the legacy of the show. The characters were old enough; it was time to move on. In that gay man/straight woman scenario, someone has to get married and move on. There has to be an ending eventually or it gets pathetic.

Were there any particularly ridiculous things that you remember doing?
We did a live show for America. We did it twice – one for the east coast and one three hours later for the west coast. There was a huge food fight and a bathroom brawl scene and a whole pill gag where we opened Karen’s medicine cupboard and hundreds of pill bottles came out. It worked fine the first time but it all went wrong the second. Sean and Debra [Messing, who plays Grace] were never good at keeping a straight face and the audience love that. When the pills didn’t come out, Megan [Mullally, who plays Karen] got down on her knees and chanted and begged them to come out. I broke character and said: ‘They can make King Kong but we can’t get some pills to come out of a cupboard.’

Who were your favourite guest stars on the show? I always loved it when
I always loved it when Sydney Pollack would come in and play my dad. I loved the Michael Douglas episode and when Gene Wilder played my boss.

I sang a song at Elton John’s stag party called Blow Me A Kiss which is pretty dirty when you put the right pauses in

You went to school with David Furnish. Was it a swanky posh school?
Not at all. He discovered his swanky posh side much later on in life. We were in theatre class together. We did Godspell and a whole bunch of musicals. We lost touch and, the next thing I knew, he was dating Elton John. That was a surprise. When Will & Grace started, we were invited to Elton’s Oscar party in LA and we caught up again.

Are you always popping around to their mansions?
I’ve been a few times and I went to the wedding. I sang at the stag party as well. I did a song called Blow Me A Kiss, which isn’t rude on paper but is pretty dirty when you put pauses in at the right places. It went over very well.

Do you still get confused gay men trying it on with you?
I think at this point everyone’s figured it out but, once in a while, someone will give it a try – and thank God. You don’t want to be too old for someone to at least give it a try.

What’s the best thing about being Canadian?
George Bush doesn’t run our country.

How’s the acting going?
I hadn’t acted for a year until just now. I’m filming a mini-series version of The Andromeda Strain. It’s very different from Will & Grace. There are helicopters blowing up and it’s more action-orientated, which makes a nice change.

What else are you producing?
Lovespring didn’t get picked up for more episodes, which was a real disappointment, but we wanted to continue working with the same cast so we just changed the locale. So we’re producing a pilot with the same people in it and set in the music world. It’ll be about a girl who had a big pop hit in the early 1990s and is now washed-up, living in a trailer park. Her hit becomes big again and her old manager comes out of the woodwork to help her find another 15 minutes of fame.

Cameron Diaz and Jude Law are dating

2007-08-03T01:24:00.000-07:00

It's official. Cameron Diaz and Jude Law are an item. Can you imaging the thin-haired, acne-afflicted children they might produce?

Law, a man so wooden he uses Ronseal as fake tan, is flying to the US this week to spend time with the star, taking her on a series of romantic dates before dragging her back to his place where they'll watch all his films, as Law hollers, "Watch this bit, I'm BRILLIANT in it!"

The pair worked together last year on seasonal puke-provoker 'The Holiday'. It was clear from Cameron's reaction then that she was impressed with her co-star: "Jude is charismatic, fun, open and charming. It is very easy to fall in love with him."

He's also balding, humourless and a serial cheat. And, as the paparazzi spotted, he has a cock smaller than his sense of loyalty. Quite the catch, then.

Does the Free Basic Membership Find You A Date?

2007-08-03T01:15:00.000-07:00

When it comes to online dating many people think that by signing up for just a free membership that they will get good results. The fact is this doesn't usually work. Unless you write a really outstanding profile your response will be poor.

The problem is that if no one signs up for a paying membership to these services then you wont get a response. Some of the big networks like Match.com have hundreds of thousands of paying members. The problem is they also have millions of actual profiles online many of witch are people signed up for free.

Now what I'm getting to is that the large services get flooded with tons of profiles, but no one is talking to each other if no one is paying.

I'm not saying that free profiles are worthless. I actually recommend for you to sign up for many free basic memberships at the big networks. A really well written free profile can go along ways. For those who don't have a good profile though your going to have to get in contact with people who interest you. That means you have to pay.

There are other advantages to paying as well. If you happen to see someone that you are interested in you can get in contact with them and they can get to know you better. This is really effective if you feel that your looks are just average but have an excellent personality. Lets face it most of us just aren't models.

Most of us just cant write a good profile that will give us the response that were looking for. The best way around this is to simply sign up for a membership even if its just for one month. Then start to contact people that were interested in. If your concerned about the price of the membership then just think about how important it can be for you to find the love of your life.

Dating widowers - risky or rewarding?

2007-08-03T01:11:00.000-07:00

I often caution women about dating widowers. Not because I think widowers are bad guys. To the contrary, most are wonderful men who were devoted to their wives.

Rather, I base my warnings on the less-than-favorable experiences women who've dated widowers have shared with me.

Starr e-mailed, "I went into a relationship with a widower who had a career and appeared to have loved his family and his children. However, after a while, I suspected that he was seeing at least one other woman.

"After we broke up, I had a woman friend who knew him tell me he had been demoted because of an affair he had at work while his wife was alive."

Carlene commented on a widower she dated: "He still had the hallway full of pictures of her (eight years later and no, they weren't family shots). He talked to her when we walked in the door, 'Hi Mary. This is Carlene.' I got a creepy feeling and couldn't get out the door fast enough! Now when he sees me, he still complains about not being able to find a nice lady!"

Sally shared a recent widower-dating experience. "His wife had died only three months before he pursued me through a dating site. He was aggressive, persistent and had many restrictions listed on his profile. I found him to be very needy and smitten with me. I told him he was coming on too strong.

"He was in a bereavement group and in individual counseling, which was often part of our conversations until I finally said there is no space here for three people. His conduct toward me was claustrophobic and I had to end it."

Shirley, a divorced woman, said, "I assumed that a widower would be more suitable, but my experience tells me it is difficult to date a widower.

"I have found widowers hypercritical of divorcees. Many have hang-ups about single women and sex, because they married virgins and assumed that their wives were monogamous, while a divorcee may have been involved with other men.

"It's difficult to be compared to a dead spouse. So many men have fixed views about their deceased wives and hope to find a replacement, perhaps a clone, and that is detrimental to the new woman. Being compared to a flawless image is very uncomfortable."

Shirley concluded, "I'd prefer a widower, but who knows how he behaved while married? One hopes he had a truthful and loving history, but who really knows! What is a gal supposed to do? Join a nunnery?"

Sally added that she had a friend who dated a widower whose wife had died three years before. The widower insisted Sally's friend go to the cemetery with him.

"Nonsense," Sally said. "These guys are extremely needy and usually have already had 'the love of their lives,' as they put it, so you become an 'interim individual' or perhaps someone on the caboose of a train after he spends his time with children and grandchildren. It's too much work and the payback is minimal."

However, some women, such as Louise, feel differently: "I think dating widowers is the best way to go. These men have been in committed relationships and have made the effort to stay married. Once they are ready for dating, I'd always prefer dating a widower. They have learned what it means to make a commitment."

The key words in Louise's statement are "once they are ready for dating." Some widowers date too soon, before they've adequately healed, which often results in them abruptly ending their relationships. They simply wake up one morning and say to themselves, "I can't do this anymore," leaving the woman broken-hearted.

But let's give widowers a chance to comment. I'd like to hear their side of the story in dating Orange County women.

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